Ever wake up from a dream laughing?

I was up late the other night working on a final paper for one of my philosophy classes, so after I ran to campus to turn it in I took a nice long afternoon nap. Most of my really vivid dreams have been occuring during such siestas, and that day was no exception. I know your standard crazy dream stories can be tedious, but trust me, you’ll like the punchline on this one.

The dream found me on the run in an urban landscape on a soggy day. I was sick and dragging this heavy bag with me trying to evade some nebulous pursuers. When chance came, I ducked into a building to hide for a while. I went up to the 2nd floor, called someone to drive down and pick me up and found a room to wait in. The room had three large windows facing the street which made it ideal to watch for my ride or any approaching threat.

I was not alone in the room, however. There was also a group of about twenty young girls in Catholic school girl uniforms. I didn’t take much notice to them, in my distressed state, but after a while one of them started coming on to me. She sidled over, started rubbing my shoulder and asking me questions. She was a beautiful girl, sexy with red hair, but she was clearly much younger than myself. I put her off at first, but then she backed up to me and pressed her full body against me, pulling my arms around her waist.

It’s important to know at this point that I was full aware of the fact that this was a dream. I knew it wasn’t real, and that only makes what I did funnier. At that point I spun her around and asked her how old she was. “Twenty.” She told me. I didn’t believe that for a second. So what did I do?

I carded her.

Presented with a pretty, young, sexually agressive dreamgirl and what do I do? I demanded that she provide picture ID to verify her age. Funny thing is, she did. She gave me a driver’s license which I closely examined and determined to be fake! The birth date and the minor until date didn’t add up correctly.

Once I figured that out, I told her to take a walk because I didn’t want to spend 15 years in jail when pictures of us show up on MySpace.

I literally woke up from my nap laughing. I’m still trying to figure out exactly what this says about me…

I had a dream where I was on holiday in America and someone I was staying with took me out to a desert shop that sold nothing but fudge.

It was called “Fudge Packers”.

What does that say about us? Just means we’re fucking funny I suppose.

:edit: To clarify, yeh I woke up laughing from this one - My girl realised I was nuts that morning.

And so the name was born!

No laughing. Some screaming. You’re a freak.

So if you know it is a dream and she was say, seventeen and then you succumbed, would that still be make you an old perv? Yeah. I guess it would. I am pretending you were having that dilemma and not me. 'Cause a 17-year-old pig-tailed Brittney from her heydey would be a challenge to walk away from.

Whenever I realize it’s a dream, I always try to make the most of it. If you see that chick again, send her over to my dream for some hot school girl sex.

… having to add words to these posts really lessens the impact

That pic is post-Tyler walking away from her.

And here is something just for you, Brad! Order today:

I wake up laughing hysterically once a month or so. I don’t mind; it’s fun and it freaks my friends out if I’m at one of their places.

Fortunately, your friends are imaginary!

I’ve woken myself up not exactly guffawing but with a kind of chuckling snort. Hnph, I go, as whatever awful disgusting disturbing monstrosity that is currently having its way with me (or vice-versa) stops to drop a non-sequitir. I laughed but stayed within the dream realm a few days ago when I met somebody who was supposed to be from Qt3, I think it was Joel but then he sort of morphed into Old Man Gravy but he was from Australia. He drove a beat-to-shit Range Rover full of all kinds of kooky shit, and he laughed and shook my hand and said “OI LETS GOO GET US SOOM PYANTS NOO?” and I laughed and suggested a local bar. Then, you know, teh buttsex0rz.

I never remember my dreams, a fact for which I am now very grateful.

but an episode of batman the animated series told me you can’t read when you’re in a dream state.

Even if I do realize it’s a dream, I still can’t bring myself to cheat on my partner. In my dreams, I actually tell beautiful, naked women to stop and leave me alone because what they want to do wouldn’t be fair to my girlfriend. Isn’t that sad?

But the guy behind the counter can say, “Welcome to Fudge Packers, where your fudge is packed at no additional cost!”

Yeah, and that you cannot see in color. Both of those are wrong. You have a tendency to be unable to read in dreams because it is an anxiety holdover from childhood, when you could not read, or something like that. Or you’re gay.

I actually “asked” my friend what the place was called, pretty sure that’s what got the ball rolling.

I do that too, and then I spend the rest of the dream and probably half of the next real-life day feeling guilty.

edit: No wait, actually now that I think about it, they usually tell me that, even though they started it, we can’t continue because I have a girlfriend. What kind of absurd dream logic is that?

Not with her standing right behind you reading this, it ain’t!

I guess I’m a total geek because my favorite lucid dreams are the ones where I become a fucking jedi master. It doesn’t happen very often, maybe a couple times a year, but damn, are they ever fun.