A letter from The Power to Public Enemy

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2005/9/2moe.html

And I wonder if I might offer you some constructive criticism. Among the problems, I think, has been your clarity of precisely why you were fighting me and how you intended to wage that fight. Like when you say: “As the rhythm designed to bounce / What counts is that the rhymes / Designed to fill your mind / Now that you’ve realized the pride’s arrived / We got to pump the stuff to make us tough / from the heart / It’s a start, a work of art.” Pardon my frankness but what the hell are you talking about there? It rhymes, but what are people supposed to do with that information? If you’re trying to fight someone, especially someone like me, you need clear action items. Maybe “Carjack The Power’s limousine after an important board meeting” or “Expose The Power’s malfeasance in a national publication” or maybe “Propose a better alternative to The Power and let the people decide.” Those are just off the top of my head! Look, take this advice or don’t, but before dismissing it just remember The Power must know what he’s doing, right? Thus the name. Think about it.

http://www.freakytrigger.co.uk/hate/2000_07_01_hated.html#544161/hate/2000_07_23_hated.html

The Other Day, 1988

Dear Mr D.

In our opinion, we are suckers.

We are most interested in having you for our army, or whatever. We are aware that, in our visualisation of your giving ‘a damn’, you are most likely to say ‘never’. This is possibly due to our being a land that never ourselves gave a damn about a brother, like you or yourself. This is because we never did…

utter genius