Amazon Prime video streaming

Samaritan is the name of the Superman-analogue in Kurt Busiek’s Astro City graphic novels. Those would make a fun TV series.

I watched this (“The Protege”) last night. Samuel Jackson? Michael Keaton? Maybe it’ll be good? Maybe I’m dumb, or I was too tired but nothing in the movie made any sense. I guess I’ll spoiler this, if you have any intention of watching it, don’t click:

So, Samuel Jackson is a professional assassin who kills people professionally, but this one time he gets an attack of conscience and decides to help out the kid of someone he killed. Except it turns out he didn’t kill him, the guy faked his own assassination so he could… become a billionaire philanthropist that I guess nobody recognizes for reasons that aren’t clear. But when Jackson starts searching for the kid, assassins kill him and go after his protege. So, she (the protege) decides to find out about the kid to get revenge, I guess? Except it turns out Jackson isn’t dead so there wasn’t really any reason to need to get revenge? But Jackson doesn’t bother telling his protege he’s still alive until later so, oops, I guess. Anyway the kid turns out to be a total red herring I guess? It’s never clear why the bad guys had to kill everyone to keep Jackson from finding the kid, who turns out to be catatonic and couldn’t have told him anything. Anyway, for some reason Jackson is really mad at the guy he didn’t actually kill for trying to have him killed, I guess, so gets revenge by committing suicide. And then the protege kills Michael Keaton for some reason. Oh, and there’s something about a flashback where Jackson rescues the protege as a child, but she cut her hair so you think it’s not her.

I mean, did anybody read this script?

Assassin movies seem to be the lowest hanging fruit these days. I suspect they manage to get access to a known start and just pull Assassin Movie #56 out of the drawer to give them a vehicle. How many times has “She’s a trained assassing that is on the run from her own organization!” been made?

I thought this happened in April, but…

It did happen in April … In the UK

Even when No Time To Die went to Prime Video, the other movies were taken off. So now the US has caught up to the UK!

I feel like I should mix them up this time, watch them in some kind of weird order. Maybe I can start with the Pierce Brosnan ones first, and go backward in time.

Pretty sure that over the summer I started Casino Royale with the wife to get her into the new Bond from the beginning. And it looked like most of not all Bonds were available then.

EDIT: Well, now Prime is showing CS as a ‘rent or buy’. I know I started it and never finished in in the last few months, presumably on Prime but whatever. Maybe I’m in the wrong multiverse.

Sweet Jesus Amazon is bad at surfacing stuff. It’s the start of the month, so like I always do, I’m trawling through the list of newly added movies. After going past 180 movies, most of which are nothingburgers, it finally shows me the “Amazon exclusive” Everything Everywhere All At Once. For fuck’s sake, Amazon, this should be the very first thing I see when I open the app. It’s not even in the list of Originals and Exclusives.

It’s also largely true of Netflix, but it’s baffling to me why these new addition lists seem to have no concept of “bigness”. Like, only a few movies before EEAAO was Baby Driver, which was definitely a bigger movie than 95% of the movies before it. Most people aren’t going to scroll as far as I do You’d think user retention would be a big driver of UX for these platforms but they just don’t seem to care that most of their users don’t know what they have.

What country are you in? I’m in the U.S. and EEAAO is still buy/rent on Amazon for me.

United Kingdom

Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (2010) was surprisingly good. We enjoyed it quite a lot and got a few belly laughs out of it even. But I’d never heard of it before, and assumed it was something new. It just randomly showed up on my Prime Movie front page today, and the premise sounded great.

Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine were just wonderful in their lead roles, but so was the rest of the cast. I give it 4 starts out of 5. Possibly 4.5 on a good day.

Tucker and Dale versus Evil is a great watch, and over in the horror subreddit is almost always the first recommendation for a funny horror movie. Would be a great Halloween watch!

It narrowly failed to make the cut in our great horror flicks of the last 15 years thread:

I’m not sure if we have a thread on the movie “Air”, it’s an Amazon Prime movie that was in theaters and now is on Prime Video. A bit of a hard name to search for, being just three letters.

Anyway, good movie. I love sports movies anyway, and it’s a nice clever movie that is about Michael Jordan signing with Nike, that skirts around Jordan himself. It never really shows him. The movie is told from the perspective of Nike, and he mostly talks to Jordan’s parents and agent in the movie. I really enjoyed it. Good music selection for it to be set in 1984 too.

These sound like pretty good Asian superhero movies.

As I was saying…

Also, damn you for spoiling my Frame Game pick.

I watched Shin Kamen Rider and it was ok-ish. It is re-imagining of the first Kamen Rider story (each Kamen Rider is an re-imagining/repackaging of the first already, but I digress…). Kamen Rider was a kids show but this “shin” version is very bloody version of a kids show. CGI is just bad (e.g. bad bat flying). They did better with props and real costumes.

IMO Polygon gives it too much credit, more like ok but not good.

I haven’t watched the Japanese movie yet, and I might not get the chance anyway, but the Tamil movie mentioned in this article is just a blast. I’ve been watching it with my mom over the last however many days since I posted the article. Great fun.