AP Poll: America's Greatest Villain

Search your heart. [URL=“http://home.businesswire.com/portal/site/google/index.jsp?ndmViewId=news_view&newsId=20061228005253&newsLang=en”]You know it to be true:

When asked to name the past year’s biggest villain, Bush was far and away the #1 choice, commanding 25% of the vote, distantly trailed by Osama Bin Laden (8%), Saddam Hussein (6%), President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad of Iran (5%), North Korean leader Kim Jong II (2%) and Donald Rumsfeld (2%). Satan only took in 1% of the vote.

I want to be able to have some sympathy for the guy, but watching him pull his “momentous choice” BS routine on the war, pretending he’s going to do anything but escalate the war in a desperate bid to prove that he was right all along… It’s sickening.

I don’t think it’s about proving that he was right as much as it is about him not wanting to be the President behind a losing war effort.

Somebody needs to tell him he’s failed. Ooops! Nobody honest works for him…

Dude, you left out the funniest part:

Of course, 25% named him top villain, but only 13% named him top hero.

-Tom

All this says is that Americans are parochial and uninformed. (I’d say the same about Europeans if they rated Bush a greater evil than, say, Kim Jong Il, who starved and tortured more than Bush and Satan combined!)

Europeans can be just as dumb and led by what they see on TV as Americans I’ve no doubt.

Mugabe would top my list but we’ve had a lot more stories about him than we have Kim Jong Il who has almost certainly killed more of his own people than Mugabe, but Kim isn’t on the BBC every now and again blaming his famine on Tony Blair and white people generally.

I suspect Americans, as Americans do, only know names they’ve had taped to their foreheads. Bush is not only a President but a contraversial president that many people believed in, for whatever naive reasons, who made them look like fools for bestowing their trust in him. That’s personal. Beyond that, this year, who is responsible for the deaths of more Americans than Bush? The most damage done to this country in terms of policy and diplomacy?

Kim Jong Ill is a fruity Korean with a pompadour and a missle named “Taepo Dong”. That’s about as scarey a name for a missle, “Heh heh heh, Beavis, he said dong,” as wii is a clever name for an entertainment system. He’s not creepy enough to Main Street, missles or not, because he’s so ridiculous.

I don’t even think most people know who Mugabe is over here.

Bush doesn’t seem worried about bin Laden much, we haven’t invaded Pakistan, and al Qaeda hasn’t attacked anyone we’ve ever heard of recently outside of Iraq (even though there have been increasing numbers of attacks few have been dramatic enough to make it through the media cycle’s numbing drone).

Saddam’s out of business.

So parochial and uniformed, yes, that assessment is hard to argue with. But from their point of view it does make sense. Villain means essentially bad guy and there’s one sitting in power in their own country who’s undermining much of what makes our country worthwhile while getting us into what may well be the greatest military debacle in our nation’s history. He may not chuckle while wrenching the fingernails off a torture victim (though I still remember his Carla Faye Tucker moment)* or deliberately starve sections of his country to protect his base of power (though spending we’re doing on Iraq now could probably have better been spent on national health care or environmental protections if the number of lives saved was really the goal). He is, though, bad enough to have earned the title in the eyes of his fellow Americans.

But, god damn it, where were you people in 2004?!

In the weeks before the execution, Bush says, a number of protesters came to Austin to demand clemency for Karla Faye Tucker. “Did you meet with any of them?” I ask. Bush whips around and stares at me. “No, I didn’t meet with any of them,” he snaps, as though I’ve just asked the dumbest, most offensive question ever posed. “I didn’t meet with Larry King either when he came down for it. I watched his interview with Tucker, though. He asked her real difficult questions like, ‘What would you say to Governor Bush?’” “What was her answer?” I wonder. “‘Please,’” Bush whimpers, his lips pursed in mock desperation, “‘don’t kill me.’” I must look shocked — ridiculing the pleas of a condemned prisoner who has since been executed seems odd and cruel — because he immediately stops smirking.

I nominate Brian for biggest villain for his disparaging remarks about the Wii.

Nobody can touch Idi Amin. Despite being leader of an almost pointless nation, he became a world celebrity purely through his own actions.

Crazy Titles? Check

“His Excellency President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor Idi Amin, VC, DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Sea, and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular.”

He later declared himself King of Scotland.

Obsessed with military medals? Check.

He had his tunic extended so it could fit on all of his unearned World War 2 medals.

Ethnic cleansing? Check

He ordered the tens of thousands of Asians in Uganda to leave, after a dream where God told him to do it.

Wanton butchery? Check.

About half a million dead.

Euphemestically named death squads? Check

The State Research Bureau.

Bizarre proclamations that destablise the region? Check.

Amin declared that he believed large parts of neighbouring Sudan and Kenya were historically part of Uganda, prompting his neighbours to bristle and make counter threats.

Hanging out with more famous evil dictators to gain cache? Check.

Big friend of Khadaffi.

Jumping on bandwagons that have nothing to do with you, just to get attention? Check.

Idi decided to wade in against the Israelis and support the PLO, something that would eventually lead to the famous “Raid on Entebbe”. This action became world famous, and spawned a number of movies.

Wow, less than half of all Democrats polled voted for Bush? Where has all our hate gone?

Idi Amin is a bastard. He should have known that I am lord of the fishes of the sea!

No one voted for Gargamel? : /

Smurf off!

I was watching, I think, NBC and Rosie O’Donnell tied with Satan for most villainous. Must be a different poll.

How can you beat Mugabe?