Apology Judgement Thread of Humiliation


This is like saying you would rather have no unicorns than bad unicorns.
(There are no bad unicorns)


The day I no longer like pizza is the day I realize my time on earth is nearing the end.

I do think Papa John’s pizza is crap, though. Thankfully I have other options.


Eh. I’ll argue this. I read a book a couple years back, Catherynne Valente’s “The Orphan’s Tales” (one book split into two parts, really)- it had a neat 1001 Nights-style stories-within-stories-within-stories structure, and a very cool weird fantasy setting.

One of the stories was about unicorns, and how, completely contrary to popular lore, they aren’t pure, innocent creatures. In fact, they’re the most corrupt beasts in existence- they crave pure, unspoiled virgins in an attempt to regain some of their lost purity.

Anyway. I liked it.


This, and @wumpus tweet reply, opened my eyes and made me consider the world from a different perspective. Thanks.


I apologize for tainting the purity of pizza with filthy unicorns.

(Get it? Cause this is the apology thread)


If I had a choice between bad sex and like anything else, I’d probably pick anything else too, like is there a romance novel around or maybe this Game of Thrones book I haven’t finished yet.


Heh, I’ve actually gotten to this point in my life, too, at the ripe old age of 44 (at the end of the month). It’s a slightly depressing/uplifting realization.

I even seem to remember @tomchick having a Shoot Club column back in the day- about going on a date with some gal when he’d rather be at home playing Aliens Vs Predator? Memory is fuzzy.




Fuck you Papa John.


Aliens vs Sex! Very cool of you to remember.




Man, where are we as a country if old white CEOs/chairs can’t even say the n word on a conference call? Psssssshhhh dumb communists.

Probably something someone said today or will say tomorrow about this news.


Awesome. I figured all those were archived somewhere. Thanks for the link, it was a fun re-read.


They are owned by Dr. Oetker? That is crazy. Frozen Pizza sold under the Dr. Oetker brand is awesome.


The real question is: is there a value for X for which bad pizza/sex is better than good X.

E.g.: I’d rather have bad pizza than good ______.






Get out.


You’ll never silence me! The truth is our there. And the truth is, fish tastes fishy! Also, we over fish, and I don’t like fish


Great news. I won’t ever have to see his smug, lying, racist face on TV ever again.

Edit: Whaddaya know? Publix has Ellio’s pizza.


Bad is bad.Good is good. If Good is bad then good is not good.