Nice. Basically if a flight attendant accuses you of being disruptive or annoying in any way YOU = TERRORIST. So, get in the jail and rot there without bail until you plead guilty. Also, we’re going to auction off your kids.
There simply has to be more to this than they’re telling.
Flight attendants are one of the most worthless careers in the whole wide world. They aren’t even hot anymore. It would be one thing if there was some vapid, pissy piece of eye candy for the passengers, instead, they have blistered hags.
Speaking of stewardesses, has anyone ever stopped to think about how it would be cheaper to give the passengers access to a huge walk in fridge, and tell them to take whatever the fuck they want than it would be to spend millions of dollars a year on flying people around the country just to pass out smaller serving sizes? Freakonomics, maaaan. Or how about this, you can fly for free if you volunteer to run the drink cart?
I’ll take you with me on my next work deployment to Asia. You will eat those words sir. It’s in America that they are all old hags that give you the evil eye when you ask for a second cup of water. In other parts of the world they actively seek out attractive and energetic people for the role.
El posto de dople!
That is the sexiest wager I have ever been a part of, at least since the Sultan of Brunei bet me a fist sized emerald I couldn’t seduce the entire Pepe Lienhard Band in under twenty four hours back in 1976. The jewel was mine to take, but the real gem to come out of it was the song that my clever disguise inspired the band to write.
I don’t care how hot or not they are. They’re still nothin but waitresses in the sky.
That Hudson river crash would have been ugly without those waitresses in the sky.
Let’s be fair; flight attendants in the states used to be hot back in the sixties. Well, guess what, they’re older now. That said, Virgin airlines has a young hot crew, whom I expect in 30 years will also look haggard and worn, but by that time American and United crews will have cycled in the new generation of hotness.
Yeah, make the whole plane fight over a limited supply of rations with no supervision. That will work! Sort of like an airborne Lord of the Flies.
The obvious compromise is to eliminate overhead storage and give each seat it’s own mini fridge.
A few years ago I was on a flight with one who really broke the mold. As I watched this atypically large and athletic flight attendant monstrosity make his way down the narrow aisle taking soda and beer requests, I realized the guy would have appeared much more at home in a WWF ring. When it was my turn to make a drink selection and I asked for a mineral water, he seemed taken aback. Then he laughed at me. “Oh HO HO HO HO! A mineral water!”. When he returned a while later he was like, “Here’s your mineral water, little person! Ho ho ho ho.”
I half expected to see the guy jump out and personally taxi the plane into ready position for takeoff, and I remember wondering then if I had just born witness to some sort of 9/11 byproduct, the Proto Attendant.
I wish they could do this same thing for technical writers. You don’t update the spec, you’re going to Gitmo.
You did NOT just diss hot waitresses.
Several hot waitresses live down the road. My daily bus rides wouldn’t be the same without them!
Our stewardesses are also still hot. Fly SAS or something.
Funny. I think the same every day. Well, maybe more Judge Dredd-style instant executions, but harsh penalties all the same.
Hey now, a tech writer can only work with the information given. :p
Funny. I thought SAS was the first airline to go the old hag route because our laws (which I do unfortunately agree with) prevented them from firing people just because they stopped being hot.
Sterling (when that was around) otoh was the gayest airline I’ve ever flown.
Gulf Air is fun with good looking sorta veiled assistants and big swarthy males looking at you dissaprovingly whenever you order alcohol and then just filling a beer glass to the brim with whisky…
Heh, that’s funny actually because the last few times I’ve flown Emirates, I found myself seated near sober Europeans and alcohol-ordering Arabs.
My last flight had one of the nastiest flight attendants I’ve ever had the misfortune of encountering. She was actually berating customers. It really has gone too far.
My favorite thing to do to piss them off is ‘accidentally’ call them waitresses.
Classy.
I actually questioned my host in Singapore about how they get away with it there and according to him (and who knows if he was shooting a line or not) they allow those under 35 to work on the flights, and those over that age are migrated to the internal and airport positions. So it sounds like they use it as a stepping stone to go higher up the chain within the airline, but also keep the folks on flights young and I suppose, energetic about their job. Let there be no doubt, the hotness factor of the Singapore airline crews beats the US by a factor of several hundred if not a thousand.