Taking some time off work. See if I can’t get some medications to break me of this and go back healthier to fix things.
I take Paxil for general depression and Buspar for anxiety and panic attacks. The Buspar changed my life. Medication can be extremely helpful. Good luck.
Well, my wife just told me that she won’t support me taking off either. Evidently, I can’t make any decision that will help me. Or she just wants an excuse to leave. I fear this is pushing me too far.
For people who don’t understand mental illness it will absolutely appear that way. It can be very hard to understand. Your salvation will be finding the right medicine. As Rich noted (Maria too) it is life altering. And if you read up on Maria and watch her shows (she does a stand-up routine in her own living room with just her parents as audience - it’s pretty heartwarming), I think it will help you identify and give you hope.
There are issues here that I don’t feel comfortable addressing. But the right medication could very well make the difference between a full life and a thing like life that is a downward spiral. For a while my present wife, at the very beginning of our life together, had an attitude like that; You have to get your shit together. Get out of bed and cheer up. Then we went to couple’s therapy. Sometimes together but mostly separately. The separate sessions helped us both. Tell your wife I said so. And she can feel free to contact me via email if she feels like it. PM me for the addy.
I tried that. The therapist said there is nothing he can do for a person unwilling to change and says all changes have to come from me to fix the realtionship. If I told her that you said so, she’d reply that she’s not going to listen to my imaginary friends. Meanwhile my daughter is weeping. She thinks I’m trying to get off work to loaf around and do nothing. She thinks I’m faking this.
You don’t seem like someone unwilling to change, simply needing a little help to overcome inertia.
Sounds like you need a new therapist and possibly a psychiatrist. I would likely not be here if I hadn’t gotten the help I needed when I needed it. The pills really help to even things out so that you can have the possibility of working through your issues with a supportive therapist. Good luck, man.
I’m not sure how much longer I can take this. seeing my therapist tomorrow. Can’t sleep tonight knowing my wife is taking my daughter. I’ve read to her every night and woken her up with a song every day since she was born.
This is downright criminal. This is not how a couple’s counselor is supposed to behave. In a couple’s setting, a therapist is there to help facilitate communication and–hopefully–understanding between two people, not parcel out blame and support one against the other. Providing this is what they actually said, instead of what you just heard, I’d suggest trying another couple’s counselor. The vast majority of them would rightfully consider it a betrayal to act this way.
But that’s almost besides the point. You need to take care of your own mental health at this point before you can take care of the combined mental health of your family.
I wouldn’t normally offer an opinion like this, because I don’t know you and I’m not a doctor, but like others here, I really think you should call a psychiatrist. Based upon my own issues, and the fact that my father became a shut-in for the last 30 years of his life because of his depression, something really does seem to be going on chemically with you here.
Better yet? Call up your regular doctor, tell them your depression has reached a crisis point, and go in and talk to them. They’ll probably make you do a test like this which helps quantify how bad things have gotten. I’ve actually done this, and they prescribed me Zoloft then and there, then referred me to a psychiatrist for ongoing support. But even just taking the Zoloft, within two weeks, things had started getting better.
Seriously, dude. Don’t wait. Pick up the phone THIS SECOND and call your doctor. You’re in crisis. You need more than just someone to listen to you at this point.
Well, here’s the plan I made with my Therapist. Starting tomorrow I will starting a 10 day out patient program where i get counseling for 8 hours at a crisis center, but I get to go home each night (as i have no intent or plan for suicide). I hope that this is approved with STD and FMLA.
Good to have a plan!
Well, my wife has left and I’m alone at night. Trying to stay frosty so I dont get committed to the laughing academy. I wish I had something to occupy the long hours.
Good luck, chief. I think you are on the right track, hard though it may be.
I’m sending warm thoughts your way. I don’t post here very often, but I know that QT3 is full of warm and caring (and awkward and weird) people who are always willing to lend a sympathetic ear. The black dog should not be faced alone.
I actually think in-patient care would be just fine. You get the care you need and have support 24/7. Nothing wrong with that at all. Wishing you well in your search for medication and counseling that nuts the magic mark for you.
Well, I start my 10-day outpatient course tomorrow. I hope this helps.
Wish you well. I’m sure you know this, but meds take time so hopefully the intensive therapy will give you the tools you need while meds get to where they need to be. And of course it may take lots of trie with different combos of meds, Also, I just happened to watch another comedian who talked about his manic depression and he tried everything… even experimental ketamine injections. What he found that finally helped him was transcranial magnetic stimulation. 45 sessions that lasted 30 minutes each. He said it was like tiny hammers tapping on his skull. https://bbrfoundation.org/discoveries/stirring-up-the-brain-magnetic-fields-and-electrical-impulses-battle-intractable
I’m not sure I’d suggest you actually watch his special as its equal comedy and equally very hard inner stuff but it’s Neal Brennan on Netflix. Get better :)
Anti-depressants might be useful here. Please consider them.
Well, about 8 days into hospitalization. It helps a lot, then I come home each night. Seems like I have a lot of trauma and a toxic relationship with my wife. I’m going to have to make some hard decisions.