Become disciples of the Church of RNGesus!

I finally got around to registering this domain and put up a placeholder page

I’d like to brainstorm some ideas of what to put on the page… and you guys humans have (mostly) good ideas!

  • philosophy of randomness, for example, when dice are contraband, God as an inveterate gambler, how to statistically test something as truly random, the history of random numbers, and so on.

  • t-shirts? stickers?

  • some prayers for people to recite before going into a random situation, which is of course … every situation

  • links to Amazon’s copious (seriously, go look) bags of dice, which can be sold – with generous amazon referrals, naturally* – as offerings to RNGesus.

  • a nice 3D browser rendered die rolling simulator?

  • sources of high quality random data?

I’ve already asked a designer friend of mine to assist with basic HTML and CSS layout, don’t worry 😉

What else? Got any “random” ideas? PRAISE THE GLORIOUS HAND OF RNGESUS!

* I was thinking all RNGesus profits (if any) could be donated to a suitably “random” charity?

I hope you churchers don’t buy out and fix the typo there.

I was in the Desktop Dungeons thread the other day and some guy stormed in demanding to know what kind of Random Number Generator was used. The reply was that the random function in Unity was used and that the result is compared to character stats. Clearly, this was not the right answer.

Words like mersenne twister and harvesting the entropy from the network noise were thrown around. I assume those are religious terms?

RNGesus is a false god. The truly enlightened follow RNGanesha.


This is amazing. How did this not already exist?!?!

Dice shop, for sure.

Alea vobiscum
Naturalem viginti quoque
Vade temere

User-submitted stories of RNG giving and taking away?

Dat temere et removeat.

Disce Latinam Tace atque abi.

Let’s face it @wumpus, you’re gonna need a high priest. Gimme a call.

Hoc tantum facit sensu.

I’m shocked that this doesn’t already exist, but I Googled “RNGesus dice” and got nothing. Someone make these and take my money!

Some thoughts:

  • Definitely a dice store. Cover the standard polyhedrals (d4, d6, d8, d10, d12, and d20) at the very least. You can conscript a Chinese plastic molder to make you something competent cheaply, or just license out somebody like WizKids or Chessex.
  • Shirts are a must. I think you can get good traction from both the tabletop and digital markets. D&D geeks love to wear D&D themed shirts for some reason
  • Customizable DM screen foldout with little clear pockets on the inside for the DM To insert game-appropriate rules summaries into, while the outside features ludicrous over the top “PRAY TO RNGESUS” artwork
  • Custom playmats for MtG players, dice towers/rollers for tabletop nerds, and cardsleeves for both CCG nuts and boardgames fans. All with RNGesus artwork as above
  • Run a weekly Twitch RPG stream in the vein of Acquisitions Inc. or Critical Role, except that the ruleset is a fully randomized hexcrawl campaign in the vein of what @milspec is plotting over in the Tabletop RPGs thread. I volunteer to DM this for a cut of only 95% of the advertising fees.
  • Retire even more wealthy than you were going to already, buried in a gleaming chrome pyramid made from melted down videocard vent covers that your army of hired hands snipped for you

gamescience dice, but with a non-shitty storefront. ;)

Claim to invest millions of dollars in a true random number generator. One that has heretofore unprecedented levels of randomness. Claim that it’s not just simulation, there’s a physical component that ensures truly random numbers. Sell it in an app for .99.

In reality, it’ll just make an API call to a personal server that returns something spit out by the stock Java Random() function.

Wait, are you guys actually going to make money out of this idiocy marketing and faith-based initiative?

I guess you could also claim non-profit status as a religious organization… no taxes!

Anyone can become a Reverend in the Universal Life Church. As I am. Not sure what it costs now. It’s a non-denominational church which has all sorts of people in it. You can even officiate at weddings. I’m actually a real Rev. No shit. There are actually a lot of weird and wonderful folks in the church.

Edit: It used to be that you needed a brick and mortar building to be an actual church. Not sure if that’s still true.

All right back from vacation and ready to make this happen, praise RNGesus! Thanks for all the feedback hopefully will have more to show soon.

Yeah, it would be great if you could officiate at weddings!

Marrying people at random!

So a hundred people enter a room, and then…