Combining the worst of Mtv, Maxim, Spike TV, VH1, etc

Tech TV had several shows I was kind of interested in and would watch from time to time. G4 has none, has had none, and I never ever watch it, and they don’t seem to be going in a direction to get me to watch anytime soon.

That Star Trek 2.0 is the worst abomination I’ve ever seen. I’d take the funny little blurbs at the top of the screen (like The Pop Up Video show does), but the rest of it has to go. Stock tickers for characters and inane chat at the bottom? Blargghhhh.

As far as I’m concerned the network disappeared after the merger. I occasionally catch an episode of X-Play now but a couple years ago TechTV was pretty much all I had on after work until prime time.

So basically G4 is now a James Bond marathon weekend away from becoming Spike TV…

Same here… I ate dinner with Leo Laporte every night. Some people watch the news, but the wife and I were tech-tv addicts. Sigh. I always hated Martin Sargent though.

Someone at G4 needs to head over to dl.tv, twit.tv, digg.com and try to sum up where they went wrong.

There’s never enough hardcore discussion of play mechanics on the show Cheat. I cannot understand why cheat has not covered how to spec a character for fast levelling in WoW.

The humor is nice, and they need more nerd news. If they can put together nerd news that openly mocks the well-monied showponies of the recording and tech industry, they’d get their clips run on news commentary shows and get free ads in family viewing and captive children at the dinner table.

There needs to be more skin on that network. I don’t care what girlgamers say, I don’t care what you liberated men think, sex sells, and, although g4 continuously flirts with the idea of putting female hosts forward as sex symbols, the way they peddle flesh makes Al-Jazeera look like Wild-On.

Well, technically someone from G4 did head over to digg.com, though I’m not sure any dirt’s been raised about the channel’s decisions.

I think there are enough people out there that want tech/gaming TV. The questions is why do these networks flounder? I think it’s because the final decision makers still don’t get the market they are trying to reach. The quality and appeal of G4 programming is widely variable.

Ummm, no. If I want skin I’ll go watch porn. I want decent tech/game related programming with some real insight and a splash of humour. I don’t need tits to make me want to play a game or watch an interview with a developer. You want T&A go watch Spike.

I have this theory that every former specialist channel below 200 on the dial will soon be generalized. I think the best past indicators of this are MTV, VH1, and ESPN, which all make much more on made-for-tv movies, reality shows and game shows than they ever did on specialist programing like music videos and full-length games. There’s still a place for specialist programming, but it’s now way, way up the dial.

I think the TV networks know this, which is why ESPN Classic had 3 new shows instead of replaying old sports, why MTV2 now has shows instead of videos, and why the goddamned Cartoon Network shows Dumb and Dumber and Saved by the Bell instead of animation.

Basically even old reruns of wide-audience material are now more profitable than narrow-focus new material, because market forces have driven syndicated shows’ reair prices down and kept ad revenues in the low part of the dial up, due to audience channel flipping still generally starting down closer to zero.

Smart networks would be wise to do what Cartoon Network did: split itself in half. You can have a generalized half (redesign CN as a kids channel with cartoons and Nick at Nite shows) at the low channel number, then try to move the more specialized half (Adult Swim’s edgier fare) up where market pressure won’t drive them to show Giligan’s Island reruns or some bullshit.

I think Spike and now G4 are responding to being low on the dial. Here in Boston, Spike is next to TNT, USA and Fox Storytime News in the low 30s, where it makes perfect sense for them to try to poach the morons who watch those channels. They won’t be that low in every market, but in enough markets that it’s a good strategy to go for a general audience (…of frat retards, but there’s tons of those).

Podcasters online will move to video a little bit at a time, poaching more and more of G4’s old audience than the internet already does. It makes sense for G4 to use its most valuable commodity, channel real estate, to make some money. We, the former target market of G4, spend too much time on the internet, and are highly resistant to commercial suggestion anyway.

Besides, it’s not like they’re cutting off some great work of art or amazing public service, here, G4’s pap was really only good in comparison to what was on the other channels during primetime. As soon as you come to your senses and realize you could do a better job than they ever could, you’ll stop looking to lesser wits to entertain you.

Ron Burgundy was right!

My theory is that the smarter networks are going to move more and more towards on-demand programming over the net. What better way to offer speciality programming? With devices like TiVo now implementing downloadable programming it’s only a few more steps until your cable company tries to sell you a box to do just that.

I’ll pass and watch porn instead… hell even HBO Real Sex or Taxicab Confessions is better (even if its weirder).

I can pretty much watch any show any time I want. All of the pay per view stuff is included in the package, and my cable box will record any other show I ask it to. I don’t have a ‘special’ cable box, just the regular one they give to their customers (I bet some Comcast customers have older boxes, but I got this one when I switched to an HDTV a few years ago, but it isn’t HD-specific).

There’s 1000 movies in there every week and probably that many shows as well.

What, like Howard Stern’s On-Demand? :P It’s already started.

Your TV still has a dial, and it goes up into the hundreds?

No, you can only watch shows that you’ve recorded. I am talking about real on-demand, not PVR programming.

Dear DaveC,

Nudity can be tasteful, and story based. I’m appalled that you thought I was just suggesting flesh for purient purposes. Porpoises.

Here are some ideas for sexing up the network, in context;

“See Mom, I’m not Gay!” -Nerds participate in activities that conclusively prove that they are heterosexuals with poor luck and bad hair, as opposed to ladyless by choice. There are prizes involved. Sometimes the challenge involves revealing their porn stash to their mother, other times it will involve accompanying their mother to a Chippendale’s Revue. Sometimes embarrassing, sometimes titillating, always good for a laugh

“World of Warcraft: Guild Chat Theater”- Viewers submit their favorite online gaming, aol, or other chatlogs, and even email correspondence, and the Studio players act it out, highlighting the drama, sexual tension, and sheer idiocy that permeates e-lationships.

“Say it to my Face” - A continuation of the previous theme, and an extrapolation of the end of the major motion picture, “Jay and Silent Bob:Strike Back,” these pieces feature conflict brought about by internet big-talkers coming face to face with people that they never thought they would meet.

“Senior Citizen Exposition” - Unknowing tech geeks are sent to chat up old people and insert as much innuedo into their explanations of the features of todays latest gadgets, or get down on their knees and fix the old chap’s PC. For every time they make a filthy joke that goes undetected, they recieve $50. The catch? Our Senior is in on the gag, and his balls are showing.

“First Amendment Challenge” - The channel publicizes an offer to expand their coverage to a half hour slot of any game currently in development that allows players to travel to the United States Senate, Senate Floor, or Mess Hall and fart on Joe Lieberman, Hillary Rodham Clinton, their aides, or their dinner. If the farting includes aggravated anal wind conditions and is completely out of context for the rest of the title, such as a puzzle game, the programmers and their pets will be featured on their very own “Icons.”

“Faith-based Skinitiative” - This show is self-explanatory.

                                                                                       Sincerely,
          
                                                                                   Redondo X. Flowers

“Say it to my Face” - A continuation of the previous theme, and an extrapolation of the end of the major motion picture, “Jay and Silent Bob:Strike Back,” these pieces feature conflict brought about by internet big-talkers coming face to face with people that they never thought they would meet.

I would watch this show.

Oddly enough Spike TV has about the best game related TV show on right now called Game Head. Plus its rumored that Reviews on the Run, a show done by the Judgement Day guys, will soon be airing after Game Head.