Coronavirus 2019

[wisefool]

@Menzo

It does seem like Trump has maybe moved past his focus on keeping the infected number low, which was hurting our response.

So the stock market went up simply because Trump indicated he was no longer going to actively stop any coronavirus response.

[KevinC]

@Strollen

Edit: started responding before your edit. You are frustrated, it is Trump.

Yeah, sorry about that, really did not mean to sound like any of that is directed at you, I’m just really frustrated with the situation. I agree this could have been way worse and I have no problems with leveraging the expertise of Google and the like, that’s great. But man, people need PTO. They’re going to need unemployment benefits. People at the deli near my work are panicking, because they are strictly paycheck-to-paycheck and the office complex where they get a lot of their business is shutting down (they also do catering for the NBA, which is… yeah).

Anyway, just before the press conference I’m talking to these people worried about losing hours and getting evicted. They’re worried about not being able to take time off sick for the same reason. The owner who I know really well is worried about going under due to lost business. These people need help, and all we got was a fucking infomercial and a rejection of the relief bill because “Democrats weren’t giving enough”. Like, really, with all of the suffering and need the GOP is going to demand their pound of flesh on abortion or irresponsible tax cuts? Ugh. Fuck them all.

[Thrag]

@wisefool

@Menzo

It does seem like Trump has maybe moved past his focus on keeping the infected number low, which was hurting our response.

So the stock market went up simply because Trump indicated he was no longer going to actively stop any coronavirus response.

Well, not just stop but actively test, but yes. That and buying lots of oil.

[SlyFrog]

@Thrag

The government basically just ceded its coronavirus response to private industry. I wonder if those CEOs up there know that if things don’t quickly get better they will be scapegoats.

Oh no, the public is mad at me, I’ll have to cry into my crystal champagne flute on my 80 ft. yacht I named “CoronaCa$h.”

[Papageno]

@SlyFrog

I genuinely can not remember any other President that we have ever had where people routinely stroked his ego like this in a way where it is clear they were told to as part of some program/doctrine. Like not even close. Does anyone else here ever remember a President, Democrat or Republican, where every speaker immediately started with the “Thank you Mr. President for doing this amazing thing, your dick is so big?”

This is seriously some scary Kim Jong Un type of shit.

Reminds me of that one episode of South Park where Randy Marsh goes to Japan to complain about “Chimpokomon” and the Japanese execs distract him by speculating that his American penis must be so much bigger than theirs.

“How is there no GIF for this?!” he asked, annoyed.

[wisefool]

Anyone remember what the blonde doctor said about the Labcorp positivity rate? was it 1%-2% tested positive?

[Thrag]

So is the supercut of everyone shaking hands and touching the mic, etc. up yet?

[Thrag]

I meant more that in Trump will point the blame at them, but either way point taken.

[Canuck]

Toronto is shutting it ALL down. Schools, daycares, libraries etc. Not quite Italy levels but they’re definitely taking it seriously.

[Sharpe]

Great picture. You know what jumps out at me? Dr. Fauci is 79 years old, 6 years older than TRUMP, and he looks great! While, Trump, yeah he don’t look so good.

[Oghier]

@Canuck

Toronto is shutting it ALL down.

In Canada, is that sort of decision made at the city, province or national level?

[Balasarius]

@dgallina

Do they give a flying FUUUCK since they will surely escape with giant golden parachutes even in case of abject failure? It’s become the American fucking way since Reagan.

Diego

Well now thanks to Trump, they all have CV. So that’s something.

[wisefool]

There is has been no jackass to human transmission confirmed yet.

[scottagibson]

@SlyFrog

Oh no, the public is mad at me, I’ll have to cry into my crystal champagne flute on my 80 ft. yacht I named “CornaCa$h.”

It’s an 80 meter yacht. Feets is for proles.

[Vesper]

How come the John Hopkins map doesn’t show Colorado or California anymore?

[Woolen_Horde]

Refresh. It has hiccups; it’s probably getting more traffic than PornHub.

[dionisus1122]

We had our first death in Colorado today. An 80 y/o woman with underlying health issues.

[ShivaX]

Stonekettle (Stonekettle)

[vyshka]

We’ll see

Google Communications (Google_Comms)

[wisefool]

“Just looking for a pregnancy test online.”

“But there’s a drugstore half a b…”