Damsel - Millie Bobby Brown versus a dragon

I thought it was fine but would have been much better had it not taken itself so seriously, although someone must have turned off fall damage in the settings.

The more I think about this (and dear lord why am I wasting my time thinking about this movie) the less sense it makes. At first I was thinking "after a few centuries of this aren’t they running out of neighboring kingdoms to pull this on?'. But then I realized, wait, why are they doing this with foreign princesses at all? Wouldn’t one of their own peasant girls do just as well? Much easier and cheaper.

Ghaaah! Why are you making me think hard enough to try and justify this movie’s silliness!

First, it’s only “once a generation” so it’s only happened ten to twenty times. Second, the impression you get is that the island is shrouded from everyone else by the mists, so they’ve got some secrecy working for them too. Third, I don’t know that they were “pulling” anything on anyone. King Winstone seemed to know what was going on; it was only the girls who were being duped.

Well you see… it’s because… uh… hmm. Yeah, I got nothin’.

That would be ridiculously cheaper, and you’d probably have no shortage of poor or even just not-wealthy families lining up to sacrifice their kids. And the kids might even go willingly. Dull movie though.

It seemed to me that Winstone’s character only knew after the meeting with the evil king and queen when they’d already gotten to the island. He was visibly shaken after that meeting, whereas before he was pretty jolly.

wife watched about half of this last night while I putzed around on my tablet. From what I can tell based on my glances up, it’s horrible. Lots of screaming by Eleven. I’ll make sure I’m not around if she watches the 2nd half.

Aw, man, I knew there’d be at least one pleasant surprise if I stuck with it! But after that opening scene of the soldiers in the cave, with that painfully made-for-Syfy staging of the first dragon attack, I was ready to nope out. So once the action subsided to introduce Millie Bobby Brown playing Millie Bobby Brown as Millie Bobby Brown, I decided I just couldn’t.

I guess I don’t feel so bad missing out on a little Shohreh if it’s just her voice. Although, damn, what a voice!

What? You didn’t like them helpfully getting into line formation so the dragon could blast them all in the face in one shot?

I thought that the dragon was the best bit of this film. I very much liked the creature design and the concept of breathing napalm rather than flame.

But, as she was the last of her kind, having three daughters wasn’t going to be the best bet for the continuity of her lineage…

This was such a vehicle of a film, with a very weak plot, but I notably did watch the entirety of it, which is a relatively rare feat for a film on a streaming service for me…

Are you proposing Incest?

I watched this with the family and we had a grand time making jokes. It was definitely one of the movies we watched this week.

Alas, one of my burish, philistine offsprings offered this impression:

Glow worms! I guess they wouldn’t work on dear old dad? This film was a waste of a perfectly well designed Dragon.