Dang it! My kid wants a FIFA game. HELP.


My dad is from Hendon, not Hundon.


It should be noted that both @triggercut and @Chappers are Tottenham fans. Isn’t Tottenham’s nickname “The English Diving Club”?*

*I kid of course. Just sad they will probably finish above Liverpool.


I think you have us confused @marquac , we are purveyors of the beautiful game. You should be happy, you just made the Champion’s league semi finals at @Richard_Holt 's expense.


Really, is it too much to ask that we win something? It’s true, money can’t buy happiness.


Diving? Dele? NEVER. Such things NEVER TAKE PLACE. He only falls to the pitch after savage and brutal spikes-up challenges, I tells ya!



(Now get him signed long-term again!)


I’m all the way to 2026, still trying to get Scotland to the knockout phase of an international tournament for the first time in their 146 year history.

Final game of World Cup Qualifying and Scotland have to beat Russia by two clear goals to go through. The Russians have had by far the better of the game (76% possession in the first 25 minutes for a start), but somehow Scotland are winning 1-0 and on course for the most Scottish of failures - a victory that isn’t quite victory enough to mean something.

And then…

I’ll probably get Brazil and England in the group phase or something, and McGarry is 27 now, so there’s probably only two more World Cups in him, but we’ll keep trying!


My kid is going to love that header. Really nice. Also, really good passing in that sequence.

Two games ago (IRL), he had two key assists in one of his games. One of them was a beautiful cross to a header goal. I always get nervous when he does headers, so I like seeing him deliver the pass. When I played basketball, I was the point guard, so I see the value of the assist.

At any rate, really cool clip. How do you capture those? He usually sends me his goals in FIFA by recording them on his phone, which makes them tough to see.



I love assists! In real life there’s nothing I like more than breaking through, drawing the keeper and out and then rolling the ball across the box for someone to tap into an empty net.

For the recording, modern GPUs come with software to make this pretty easy. Either ReLive for AMD or Shadowplay for NVidia cards. It just runs a spooling recording of the last [n] minutes, (I have it set to 5), so you can say “record that cool thing that just happened!”

Then I use the old Windows Movie Maker to just clip out the specific piece I want. I have Adboe Premiere, but that’s a bit overkill for something simple like this.


Ah. I see. Sadly my kid plays on a console.

Thank you for laying it out for me though, Mr_Bismarck.

That was his first assist in the game I was talking about. Almost exactly that. He just moved down into the box and then slid the ball over to his teammate when the keeper came to challenge him. Then his teammate just, as you say, tapped it in. It was a thing of beauty.



It doesn’t hurt that my real life team has a player-manager and he plays up front. So by giving him the goal I’m making sure he keeps picking me.


2026 World Cup Group F

Things are going to have to go really Scottish to fail to get out of that group.


Oh Canada…


You’re welcome, Canada.



We did it boys.

Not in the way I expected, because we’re Scotland, but we did it.

We beat Egypt 3-1 in the first game and then watched with raised eyebrows as Germany struggled by Canada 1-0 with a goal in the 85th minute, but then understood that result a little more as we could only get a 0-0 draw with the Canadians. It turns out that 2026 Canada has five big, physical and talented defenders who are really hard to do anything to.

I was hoping that Germany would win their game against Egypt as that would give them six points, guarantee qualification and maybe make them take their eye off the ball a little for our game, but somehow they drew, meaning all four teams were still in the hunt going into the final round of matches.

A draw would be enough to put both us and Germany into the knockout phase, but if Germany won then a Canadian victory or a big Egyptian victory, (goal difference counts), would send us back home.

Then it turns out 2026 Germany had some issues up front - their defence was good and the midfield was the right mix of creative and combative, but they’d work the ball to the final third and then run out of ideas as their forwards just didn’t offer much.

In added time at the end of the first half, this happened…

That turned out to be enough as not only did Scotland progress out of the group phase for the first time in their history, we even won the group!

Up next is the Ivory Coast and whoever wins that game gets to play the winner of… Brazil vs Finland.


Whatever comes next now against Cote d’Ivoire I feel like I can retire FIFA 17 now, with a big MISSION ACCOMPLISHED banner for Scotland.

Which is perfect, because FIFA18 just went on sale and the free FIFA18 World Cup Expansion comes out in five days.


I don’t have a lot to add other than say that I am loving these, keep them coming!


I hope you meant that, because one of the primary reasons I’m doing the Scotland thing is because of a good friend who’s a Scot and was bemoaning their failure to qualify for, well, anything recently.

So when I managed to get Scotland to their first ever knockout game ever, it made sense to just record the whole thing.

People who for reasons unknown don’t want to watch someone else play FIFA quite poorly for 31 minutes can enjoy these shortcuts.


This is all in “Be A Leg End” mode, where I’m controlling only the player with the marking above his head. I can shout “dude, give me the ball!” but that’s pretty much the extent of the control I have over the tactics and the other 10 players.


Congrats on a hat trick and making it to the next round. I hope that Finland somehow beat Brazil. While Cote d’Ivoire couldn’t handle you, the Scottish defense looked pretty darn solid.


I can’t do the whole awesome breakdown, but I just want people to know, since a VERY good friend of mine is running a certain pool, that Poland just won the World Cup. Thanks to my son.

So we can all just chill out and not worry about any of these silly matches that are about to start tomorrow.