Dell monitor support -- LAMEST EVER

Good lord. You can’t get into their fucking system without a service tag, but their monitors don’t HAVE a service tag. What the fuck?!

So I have to phone them. The only way I figured this out is because I simply ran out of options for trying to reach Dell using their online ticketing system. There is no place on their menus that actually say “Oh, and if you have a monitor or don’t have a Service Tag, just give us a call!” Fuckers

Oh, to add insult to injury, when calling in you STILL need it and you need to sit there for an extra minute if you don’t have a service code since it keeps asking for it over and over even if you’re hammering the ‘0’ key.

Jesus, what cock monkeys.

I’m on hold for 27 minutes, the guy asks for my service tag. I tell him I don’t have one, so he asks for my customer #, which I give.

He then has me run all the tests I’ve already run. He has no idea what this monitor is or what the problem is, but he keeps putting me on hold to “find out what to do”.

So, get this – he asks me to unplug the monitor from the computer, turn it off and then turn it back on. The self-test box comes up, and it’s ghosting.

Rep: “Sir, that means that the monitor is fine”
Me: “Uhhh…no, it’s still ghosting.”
Rep: “Sir, it’s a problem with your computer”
Me: “The computer isn’t attached”
Rep: “But, with the self-test, it shows that it’s the computer or your software”
Me: “Uh…dude, the computer isn’t attached and the monitor is still doing it.”
Rep: “Sir, we can’t initiate a return if the monitor is functional.”
Me: “It’s NOT functional! It’s ghosting like mad and burning in to the point that it’s useless for design work!”
Rep: “Sir, uh, with the self-test —”
Me: “Are you aware that a self-test can still pass and the monitor can still be broken? Like, the backlight could start dying or some other circuitry could die and the self-test would still run, right?”
Rep: “Sir, uh…hold on.”

Five minutes elapse

Rep: “Sir, uh, I guess we can do a return here”

Anyway, after pitching a goddamn fit they finally came around, but it was goddamn infuriating. Apparently they have a 21-day return policy, after which returns are ONLY authorized if you do their tests, with a tech on the phone, and they decide that, in fact, your monitor is broken.

Moral: fuck up your monitor before calling and just say it doesn’t power on anymore.

BTW, total hold/troubleshooting time was 1 hour and 10 minutes.

Interesting read. This is a classic example of what happens when the person you are talking to knows less about the equipment they are supporting than you do. I’ve had that problem many a time, including with Dell. It’s definitely frustrating.

Oh, just thought I’d post a reply so you wouldn’t have a thread with you talking to yourself. We don’t want to be thinking you’re lonely or anything (hmm, is that why you call tech support?). :wink:

I sympathize. I had a hellish experience trying to get a Dell Workgroup Laser Printer serviced out of warranty. I told them that paying for repair was not an issue, but it took me about 3 hours of phone time over two days. I was livid.

Dell is cheap. I never expected good support buying anything from them. To be honest, I have a 10 minute rule for dealing with “On Hold” or “Talking To Moron”, the expiration of which results in me calling the credit card company instead.

This has only happened once: Napster 2 worked well enough to sell me songs, but not good enough to let me download and play them. USAA dealt with it.

Someone told me that decent tech support was Dell’s schtick, but I’ve never bothered to call and find out.

Must’ve been a Dell commercial. Nobody who’s actually dealt with them would say that.

You can always try the magic words, “Let me speak to your supervisor, please.” In a few of the call centers I’ve worked with they’re required to tranfer you to a Lead or a Supervisor if you ask for it.

I’ve always had good results using Dell’s online customer service chat facility. I’ve never had to wait more than 2 minutes for a response, and, because it’s written and you can scroll up and down the chat history, there’s less chance for miscommunications.

I did not need a service code to talk to Dell’s online customer service reps.

I would LOVE to see that magic URL, because this sure doesn’t have it.

Ever time I call Dell I get people with very heavy Indian accents. I’m not sure its wise to leave customer service in the hands of people who cannot communicate effectively w/ the client.

And they have generic whitebread names like Steve and James? Yeah, I got one when I called LinkSys. He was on the edge of shouting at me the entire time, a nerve-wracking dialogue that culminated in, naturally, him busting the Linksys URL on me to go fix it my own damn self.

You know that’s probably on the lower end? I was on the phone for up to 3 hours trying to get them to fix my laptop video… of course in the end if it breaks up to 4 times you’re eligible for some free stuff :wink:.

It’s important to know when you get picked up by an off-shore call support center (generally in India) to not get upset. These guys are 100% drones. They have no authority to do anything more than rattle off the checklist in front of them on their screen. Just nod your head and tell them what they want to hear. “Have you checked this?” “Yes” “Can you do a hard restart?” “Sure [gets a drink, comes back a minute later]. Ok”. Ect. Just get them past all the preliminaries and further down that checklist on the screen.

That said, i hate using Dell simply because of their tech support policies. Although i called ATI for tech support, got a nice sounding Canadian girl who fowarded me to “high level tech support, guaranteed to answer in 30 seconds”, and set on the phone for 45 minutes listening to the same canucks rattle off a ATI commercial over and over and over and…

Click “Chat with Order Support”

Right, the support option that is specifically not for hardware support, and when you select “hardware support” as the problem, you get redirected back to the Service Tag requiring form? That one?

I am seeing a trend in the outsourcing industry which is drawing CS jobs back into the US, at least in certain fields. Should I get a person that is obviously Indian, I will ask to speak to a native English speaker. If they lie to me or say no, I will simply stop using products from that company. I try to go out of my way to pre-emptively stop using products from companies that outsource like that, but it’s hard to tell which do it and which don’t without first hand experience with all of them, especially considering most of the electronics I buy don’t have a tendency to break.

I was considering buying another Dell monitor, but now that I know they outsource, I will no longer be doing so. The whole trend would be stopped completely if more people would tell these companies – with their wallets – that the practice is unacceptable.

I absolutely love my Dell widescreen LCDs, and have been lucky so far in that they’ve been trouble-free. But I have friends who’ve had problems with Dell support similar to BTG’s – getting tech support people who sound as if they know nothing about computers, mindlessly following a support flowchart and rattling off canned responses even if they make no sense whatsoever. Their ability to “help,” at least on the initial call, seems fairly limited.

Ugh. How absolutely annoying. All my previous customer service requests were Order/shipping related, so I never needed one.

I just opened a chat request using the “other non-technical question” to ask them “Is online customer support available for the Dell LCD monitors I order from the website?” But I ran out of patience after 5 minutes.