Come on. Just as you don’t need a real estate agent to buy a house, you don’t need a lawyer to get divorced. I’d recommend it, though.
Geez. Lighten up on poor Athryn everybody.
Explain to me how I have been screwed? I have my final divorce judgment sitting here in front of me, showing me that I am, in fact, divorced. My divorce was amicable in the State of California, with no property to settle (as we sold our house together and divided the money evenly as per California law.) We didn’t have any kids, so I am not understand what the problem is here and why (several people in this thread) are treating me like some blithering idiot.
This is not some sort of do-it-yourself thing I’m talking about, paralegals are used all the time in the State of California to do divorces, with couples under the same circumstances as my own divorce. The big caveat is that both parties have to be in agreement for all the terms of the divorce, which we were.
So lay the fuck off of me and please stop treating me like I have an invalid opinion.
Did you have a sans-lawyer divorce that went ugly or something?
Oh I don’t think anyone is suggesting you aren’t entitled to your opinion. I think it’s the bad-advice aspect people are wincing at. I’m glad it worked out for you and your circumstance, but it doesn’t sound like good advice to give out to people who may not have your circumstances.
I would recommend anyone getting divorced consult a lawyer even if they think they’ve got everything under control. Spending a few hundred bucks more now may save a LOT of grief down the line.
If others are like me, this reads a bit like “bad” insurance or investment advice.
Lawyers in an amicable divorce are like insurance: they are there because potential problems tend to be catastrophic and undetectable. Even if we presume, post facto, that 90% of divorces could do without a lawyer, the advice is bad because the 10% who do need it need it BAD.
So, is it statistically true that a 20 year old in seemingly perfect health is better off not getting health insurance? Sure, insurance money is almost certainly not going to see a return. Is it good advice to tell that 20 year old to play the favorable odds and pass up coverage? Hell no.
Have any of you posting telling me I’m wrong actually gone through a divorce?
ETA: I am not a lawyer, nor an expert. I was just sharing based on my own experience. Any time children are involved or anything beyond the simple dissolution of a marriage, yes of course you should get a lawyer. However, with a simple amicable divorce, many counties (at least in CA) recommend a paralegal service.
I thought message boards were here to encourage discussion, not stifle it. Just like with that Polanski thread, I’m sorry I even posted anything in the first place. It’s getting awfully hostile around here.
As is so true of a lot of decisions, it depends on how much risk you and your soon to be ex can tolerate. Going without a lawyer is more risky, but less expensive. Going with a lawyer is less risky (but not always perfect) and a lot more expensive. Decide what you want to do and do it.
In the case of kids, the risk goes up probably greater than the expense goes down, so with kids you’d more likely want a lawyer. On the other hand, there are thousands who are divorced with kids and still didn’t get a lawyer and they are doing just fine.
There are some things a lawyer is REQUIRED for, but divorce isn’t one of them.
well don’t look for an inexpensive one because some times it costs you more than an expensive lawyer. search for a good lawyer mate http://wnospam
REPORTED! Spambot dragging up 5 year old topic.
lol I was thinking, damn, JPR still needs a divorce lawyer??
— Alan
Round 2 - [b]FIGHT![/b]
Do you need a lawyer? Hope for the best but plan for the worst. I haven’t been through a divorce but have several close friends who have. One of them went the “amicable” approach, decided to save money by forgoing the lawyer, he and his wife agreed they didn’t need to bring lawyers in, and then at the last minute his wife hired one “just because I’m so bad at this stuff, I figured it was worth the money to have him take care of the details, and I’m too emotional for this anyway. But don’t worry.”
I don’t have to finish the story (but I will - he got screwed.) So for sure, if the wife gets a lawyer, you need one. And if there is custody involved, you absolutely need one.
However I don’t think his original question was whether he needed a lawyer but how to find a good one for the best price. I do not know that in this case. (but if anyone needs a great employment attorney, I have one! :) )
Yeah, I happened to look at the forum for the third time in a year and was surprised to see this here.
For what it’s worth, I did find a lawyer (who was not cheap). We did have custody decisions to make, but it all ended up being pretty amicable, so the legal costs ended up being relatively modest, considering. Things have been fine since.
When a divorce is the right thing, it’s pretty freeing, but the enormity of the hassle and pressure to get it done correctly cannot be overstated.
Glad to hear things worked out for you, JPR.