Dominions 5 - Born to be Van Wilder

I had a berry start with a level 3 throne, 80 heavy cav, elephants, two water provinces and my starting extra province as my capitol ring. Yeah, that didn’t go so well.

Nah, not overly pushing mapnuke, just an option I thought I’d throw out if there were issues around finding an appropriate map. I had a quick look with dozenrealm myself and I’m fine with it. Well any map really because in the end, all you guys will find on the map are little Ermor flags as we reside over an empire of bones and dust (and maybe even our own bones).

I read that as man puke.

Carry on.

i’ve had a look at dozenrealm. my only comment is the larger number of potential provinces per player?

In the sample games I’ve run on dozenrealms it seems like I’ve almost always been next door to somebody or even a couple somebodies.

I must be REALLY rusty. I have yet to adjust my Tin Foil Hat of Dominions Paranoia (Construction 2, 5 beers, any type). I actually believed, for a minute, @Kelan and @dfs bemoaning how they were barely able to expand and immediately ran into other players. Niefel Giants and Ubar super Jinn…unable to expand…just let me put this hat on… ah yes.
LIES, I TELL YOU!! Each one of them is really saying, " Gee, I wasn’t able to fully crush my neighbor under my huge Frozen Ax of Limb Lopping/blazing hot Scimitar of Doom Casting within the first ten turns. Woe is me. "

Do not buy into the propaganda. Only the True Word of the Bat Network News will steer you right!

For instance, I don’t hear @Strato complaining about his Ermor praetors commanding bones, or @Evil_Steve complaining about hordes of naked women. Well…maybe we know why @Evil_Steve is quiet.

Seriously I can’t get more than 20 provinces in the first year with these guys. I think this nation is under powered.

I was having a pretty tough time, but i guess we need to either dial up the indies or dial down the resources if its too easy, right?

A jest right?

I must admit, I really wish I had some size 2 recruits to mix in with my giants. They do get beat up pretty bad sometimes.

In some ways I was hoping for another crack at Xibalba this game, but I am happy to let you have them, @Akaoni ! They always worked best for me when I could create a critical mass of them and that is hard enough with the 50% gold income, but doubly hard when you can’t mass them in any forest or cave province you gain because of the new recruitment point limits. Who cares if you lose 10-20 a battle if you are hiring 80-100 every turn!

well i was acquitting myself swimmmingly (in my dreams) until i ran into some premonitions of @strato 's equites, and then, well, arse over tit is an expression that comes to mind

Turn 20 of my test game. I still haven’t been able to completely take my cap circle because it has 2 provinces, one with 40-80 barbarians, and the other with about 70 Jaguar Warriors. I probably could have, but both Fomoria and Pan declared war on me as soon as they saw me. Fortunately, I found some Lava Warriors in the caves, and they DEFINITELY are worth their price in EA.

If only there was some way to afford those marvellous units.

They’re a great unit, especially for EA, but I’ve always played Scales Ermor because I never had a good bless for them in Dom 3/4.

Maybe in Dominions 5… Maybe… ;-)

look i know my favourite part of the game is the prep, but can we START? ;)

sorry, i had a hell of a week that prevented me from doing any kind of dominions work (btw, if you’ve never had a cracked water main, put that in the column of things you’d rather not experience. However, the upside is that since it’s been fixed i’ve been pretty elated with things like having water come out of taps, its like magic when you think of it).

I’ll have my nation locked up this weekend and then…we should be able to begin in short order.

glad it worked out. i often look at water coming out of taps as being one of the ultimate tech triumphs and cast a thought of gratitude to the ancestors. i suspect that people who demonstrate for their right to party in a pandemic don’t see plumbing in quite the same way. but i digress. take your time. i’d actually forgotten you hadn’t picked yet!

even I did some prep for this! and can’t tell how nasty the province defense is, I am doing okay and ready to “”“win”""

Plenty of pools of water laying around huh?

Sounds like you’re getting ready to cast Vengeful Water again :)

hah! vengeful water! how did i forget! :D

So i really want to choose Oceania - just from a balance perspective in this game, they seem to be the right choice. And maybe in a different map, they might work out ok - but this map maker didn’t put thrones in the water for some reason, and that makes it doubly tough to find a path to victory with oceania. Plus they don’t really have any endgame tools - they just sort of dump you out at midgame and go, ok, go play on land with giants and bats and undead, and be home by dinner!

So, for that reason, i’m gonna by Caelum, Eagle Kings. I’ll set the game up in the next day or so.