E3: Gossip, rumors, and muck raking

I am in need of two gonzo journalists for E3. Must have own show pass and the ability to gossip like a housewife. Pay negotiable. Photography, video, or audio recording ability an immense plus. Serious inquiries only with potential for future work upon successful completion of show coverage. Must have own helmet.

I don’t even wanna know what the helmet is for…

I’d actually rather know what there is to be gonzo about at E3.

Also, you missed an important point: “Bring your own ether.”

As your lawyer I advise you to bring two vials of crystallized LSD-15, a half pound of psylocybin enhanced fungi, a pair of rubber gloves, a hamster named Boo, a laptop filled with jawjacker porn, and then hoover up your nostril a pinch from the snuffbox of salvinorin-A.

Let’s get down to brass tacks. How much for the ape?

-Tom

Oh, man. Why couldn’t you have advertised for this a month ago.

Is the WOOOOOOOOOOOO! guy gonna be at E3 again?

Tranquility: You mean the personification of the American Dream?

There was no point in fighting – on our side or theirs. We had all the momentum; we were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave. So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in Las Vegas and look West, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark – the place where the wave finally broke and rolled back.

Strangely descriptive of the games industry?
DISCUSS!

LSD-25 would probably work way better. Just sayin.

I don’t know what you’re going to do but I like it a lot so far.

This job is only for those who have true grit.

I don’t know where you magic pixies came from, but I like your pixie drink!

LSD, DMSO, and a Super Soaker.

Forget the goddamn ape. You don’t need it.

Does sand in your bathing suit count?

You people voted for Hubert Humphrey! And you killed Jesus!

-Tom

If you’re going to do this true gonzo style, you wont even be at E3, instead it will be a tour of the strip clubs/hostess bars in the Downtown LA area.

I will fall on that sword.

Well, Hunter did actually attend the Mint 400. For one day.

Don’t forget the fucking golf shoes, or we’ll drown in this muck.