Enemies of the road

JM, actually I had the impression that BMWs depreciated fairly quickly. The high repair costs mean owners try to get rid of them at a fairly young age and BMWs more than a few years old are not viewed very positively. (See this post and the comments, though granted, it’s a pretty old one.)

That said, I haven’t really researched the issue vis-a-vis BMWs. My Saab had been crushed by depreciation though (which was why it was pretty reasonable for me to buy).


Aww man, I used to drive a Yellow Pontiac Sunfire. I got a really good deal on it from Craigslist!

Personally I get nervous around buses. I’ve spent enough time riding the local metro to know they can be insane drivers, and now that I’m driving next to them its worse.

  • Any large vehicle purchased simply because it was large. I don’t mind SUVs and F350s that are work vehicles or towing trailers, that’s what they’re for. But I get irate as hell seeing a Suburban pullup and out steps some soccer mom.

  • Any large vehicle that fucks up parking for everyone else

  • Any vehicle explicitly made very loud just to get attention. Spinners, LEDs, whatever, I don’t care about, because you can ignore those mostly. But when you’re sleeping and some dickhead with a loud Harley or a ricer revs his vehicle at 2AM it just reminds me of that South Park episode…

  • Corvettes. Because they’re the vehicle equivalent of a double wide trailer.

On the flip side, I totally respect people that drive Smart Cars, Honda Fits, Priuses, and minivans, because those sacrifice a significant amount of self-image (other than the whole “I’m an earth loving hippy” bit) in an effort to be practical.

Getting an SUV instead of a minivan because it suits some self-image, despite being a huge part of the problem of driving in America, drives me nuts.

My Dad’s sworn by them for most of the last 30 years (occasionally with a Merc in there) and he’s never had an issue with resale price. Compared to the depreciation from a similar “luxury” car - like, say, a Lexus - it was a no-brainer.

I don’t have any data, but I’d bet a dollar that Mercedes and BMWs depreciate much faster than Lexii.

Look at Phil with the conspicuous consumption!

They don’t make Hummers anymore, so I’ll vote for the Escalade as the single most contemptible vehicle on the road.

At least in the last ten years, BMWs have depreciated a lot faster than some of their direct competitors. I was shopping for 1999-2003 3-series BMW cars earlier this year and comparing them to G35s or sporty Lexus models (IS) was hilarious. The BMWs were a lot better selling at the time so they are more common and cheaper now. I ended up paying a hair under $9k for a vehicle that eight years previously had been worth $40k and change and was in mint condition.

It sucks that thing got destroyed.

I’m over the grieving now, but thanks for the kind words :)

Besides Harleys, what other motorcycles are still air-cooled?

If he has a stripped down car with a drab grey metal hood, he’s going to race away from every light.

If he has stack pipes on a stock truck, he’s going to gun the motor at every light.

If you’re driving around in a 30 year old Olds, you’re either in a gang or would have joined, if only you weren’t such a pussy.

My favorite are old wannabe 80s junkers that they still drive around because of their “reputation” as fast cars, like Cameros, and make much sound and bluster, but lose to everyone else at the light.

I know you’re going to be driving like a dick if it’s 5pm on the Interstate and you’re driving an oilfield truck. Gotta get 'er home! (at the cost of flying past everyone regardless of safety).

Buick sedans. When I lived in Arizona, they were the retiree vehicle of choice, and they made driving on surface streets intolerable. Most of the ones I see in the San Diego area are the same, but at least the proportion on the road is lower.

I particularly hate Audis, BMWs, and Volkswagens, because around here they’re invariably driven by lead-footed jacktards who never signal their lane changes, cut you off without warning, run red lights with impunity, stop in the crosswalk, speed like mad, and lay on the horn if you’re not driving at least 10 miles over the speed limit in dark, icy/rainy conditions.

People in pickup trucks tend to do this, too, however. The bigger the truck, the bigger the douche. They’re also prone to parking in fire lanes, or double-parking in handicapped spots despite not having a permit.

Oh, yes, and the young fellows in their Honda Civics with amplified mufflers (or, rather, de-mufflers), with their incessant high-speed lane weaving and their left-on-red tomfoolery. Boo-urns.

I don’t like any car not being driven by me. Most of those people are douchebags.

Bastages, get out of my way!

I don’t think I hate drivers of any specific make of car because there are bad drivers in all types; last night I was cut off by an Audi, this morning by a Mazda Matrix. But the negative reaction that I do have is to cars that are absurdly unreliable or ugly like Saabs or Pontiacs because they make me question the mental aptitude of the owner. But natural selection works–those cars are becoming more scarce. I don’t know when I last saw an Aztek.

Actually, there are some ugly cars that make me hate the driver–beautiful cars that have tricked out with fat rims and other trim. Like this poor Jaguar:

Audis. IF there’s a fucktard sat right on my arse in heavy traffic I don’t even have to guess the make of car.

Enormous, single-driver SUVs that haven’t ever been driven any farther than from a Factoria condo to the Fry’s in Renton. Bonus if the SUV is from a “premium” manufacturer. If you drive a Lexus SUV or an Escalade, I want you to die from cancer of the anus. Seriously.

Buicks of any manufacturer. Nothing says, “I fought in Che Long Bong and I have earned the right to do 40 mph in the fast lane” like a Buick.

I try to be an open minded, mellow kinda guy. I abhor racism, sexism, and many other -isms. However, there is one stereotype that no matter how hard I try, I cannot get away from. Women are terrible drivers.

Now I don’t mean that every single woman on the road is a bad driver. However, I’d estimate that 75%+ of the time that I notice someone doing something stupid on the road, it turns out to be a woman when I get close enough to check. This is based on nothing more than my own personal observations over the course of 12 years worth of driving. I don’t like the implications of it, and I don’t like the idea that I’m being sexist in some way. However, I can’t deny the cold hard facts that I see women driving like complete morons far more often than men. Speeding, improperly merging, failing to use the turn signal, too busy talking on the cell phone to pay attention to driving, whenever I see this stuff it seems to almost always be a woman that’s guilty of it.

So, where does that leave us? Am I sexist? :( Are women really terrible at driving? YOU DECIDE.

The auto insurance industry disagrees with you to the point that they charge women drivers less for insurance because statistically they take less risks, drive slower, and are more likely to wear their seat belts.

Yeah, well, I bet her insurance rates are higher than average (Danica’s).

Spoken by the person who was mad at his wife, sure that her accident had increased our rates, only to be told that my heinously expensive speeding ticket going through Milwaukee was the cause (they really nail you, which is pretty well known in WI and IL, but in case you are unaware and driving through the area, slow down peeps! (The ticket was something like $234)).