Fall: movies that should be over in less than a minute

I’ll bet they ||make a rope out of strips of their skin||.

Oops, lol, I used Discord spoiler tags.

This kind of reminds me of that short film where the protagonist wakes up and they’re sliding down a slope into some sort of chasm and they manage to brace and arrest their slide but… then what? Except that was good.

I went looking for what you were talking about, convinced it was called Friction! Not quite, but I now know why I thought it was called Friction:

-Tom

Yes, that, thank you.

Don’t watch this

GoneIn60Seconds_vodkeyTT_c

Haha. Ok, yeah.

If you’re stuck in a tower like that, my understanding is there are a few options to get away safe. Most will only take a minute as well, which will help the movie be over in the allotted time.

  1. There’s a small hay bale at the bottom, and you can just jump and land in it. You should probably hear an eagle screech as you go by to let you know everything is OK.

  2. You pull out your radio and summon a small one man helicopter that pulls along side, and you just jump into it, then ride it towards a destination and parachute out

  3. Jump, and right before you hit the ground you activate your grappling hook to pull you into the ground. Because the grapple gun has stronger force than gravity, they cancel each other out and you land unscathed

Dear Hollywood,

Please get @espressojim to write your dopey movies. He already has the outline for a fantastic Fall trilogy that should be green lighted immediately, if not sooner.

Signed,

One of the guys who watches a bunch of your dopey movies

Nope, not even the tallest radio tower, but you’re right that it’s way too tall to credibly be an abandoned structure and the lack of guy wires is completely absurd.

I’m sure those North Dakota TV towers were the “inspiration” for this stupidity, though.

We’re gonna all feel really dumb if this turns out to be a good movie.

-Tom

I anxiously await the Criterion Collection Edition.

9.8 m/s^2 edition.

I consulted that Wikipedia article before making my comment. Those radio towers are the tallest structures in the US, unless I am reading the page wrong. The tallest one listed is no longer the listed height and is now sub-2k ft., but I of course neglected to consider that that wouldn’t make Fall’s the tallest. It appears that it would be tied for third if the list was updated to reflect #1’s actual current height (I don’t count that Petronius Platform thing).

The tallest one is indeed sub-2k feet now (I hadn’t caught that) but that still leaves two that are taller (albeit not by much) than the 2000 foot tower in the movie.

Which, as I said, doesn’t in any sense really refute your intent - no one is going to leave a 2000 foot antenna lying around abandoned. Honestly, I mostly just wanted to post that list because I thought it was fascinating. :)

I’m just annoyed that subaquatic platform is on it.

That does seem like cheating.

Curious, I googled “how tall can a mast be without guy wires” and I got:

As a general rule, it is advisable to use guy wires to support poles, masts or structures that are taller than 12 feet

lol

Wait, they’re actually called guy wires? It never would have occurred to me in a million years those were anything but guide wires. Next y’all are gonna tell me that spikey stuff on prison fences isn’t called bobwire.

-Tom