First date smoochin'

[Cosmic_Hippo]

“Where am I?”
“Quartertothree.”
“What do you want?”
“We want information…about your date.”
"Whose side are you on? Are you making fun of me?"
“That would be telling. We want information…links…pics…”
“You won’t get it! Wait…okay.”
“By craigslist or myspace, we will.”
“Who are you?”
“The new page (of this thread).”
“Iwrotepost#1.”
“You…will never have sex.”
"I AM NOT A LOSER, I JUST HAVE A HEIGHTENED SENSE OF TASTE!"
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA”

Somewhere in a bed, asleep, Patrick McGoohan is laughing.

“By craigslist or myspace, we will.” Heh.

[Matt_Bowyer]

I used to be a real hardass about not drinking. I didn’t really have a reason, I just didn’t drink. I didn’t have anything against people that did; I’d hang out with my friends in high school, they’d get plastered, we’d shoot pool until three AM, and I’d be the guy to tell parents on the phone that no, we were perfectly fine, just hanging out at Joe’s, of COURSE no one’s drinking. I tried beer, hated the taste, and never saw the appeal.

Then I moved to Kansas City and my then-girlfriend-now-fiancee said, “Here, have a sip of Boulevard, one of our local beers.” Then she had to grab the bottle back away from me. I think I just don’t like Budweiser or Coors. Now it feels weird to watch football without eating pizza and drinking Boulevard.

I haven’t found a wine that I like the taste of yet, though. We’re wanting to drink more wine with dinner because a glass of red wine every now and then is good for you. So I get not liking the taste of things, or just not doing it because you want to.

I made sure not to be a jerk about not drinking, though – otherwise I would’ve been that elitist sober asshole, as opposed to that elitist gamer asshole.

[fuzzyslug]

CORN COB TIP!
Take your hot corn, squeeze lime juice onto it, then slather with mayonnaise. It’s absolutely delicious!

Between this and Guapo’s herpes story, I’m now feeling a little sick to the stomach. :)

[Kunikos]

…you’re not a supertaster are you?

No, I just hate mayo. It’s one of the few things out there that literally makes me feel ill just thinking about eating it.

[SlainteMhath]

CORN COB TIP!
Take your hot corn, squeeze lime juice onto it, then slather with mayonnaise. It’s absolutely delicious!

I had to reread this twice to convince myself it wasn’t a euphamism for masturbation, which would have been right at home in this thread.

[Leah_C]

I had to reread this twice to convince myself it wasn’t a euphamism for masturbation, which would have been right at home in this thread.

That would actually make it less gross than the idea of mayo on corn.

[Moore]

True story.

I once went out with this infectious disease doctor. I met her at an embassy party at the German Embassy. Her name was Jane Woo. Or Wu. Not sure.

Anyway, we had “sex” several times. Each time, it was exactly the same. She’d go down on me, but before she did, she would ask “Do you have herpes”. I swear, she did this every time, about 7-10 times. Apparently herpes can go through a condom, she explained. But we never used condoms. Maybe she went to conference on it recently? Anyway, after that, I would finger bang her, because she wouldn’t let me go down on her or have intercourse with her. Too scared of infectious diseases, the infectious disease specialist.

Also, sometimes after I came in her mouth, she would go “Are you sure you don’t have herpes?” And awkwardly, I’d assure her I didn’t.

One of the most bizarre people I’ve ever dated.

When I got my TB, Hepatitis A, and other immunizations to go to Asia, I called her up. They give you all the needles full of the immunizations but they want to charge a ton for a nurse practitioner to stick you. So I called up Jane Woo, she came over to my place, administered four shots (you were supposed to wait in between them, but whatever). Then, finally, we had sex. Even though I was then CRAWLING with infectious diseases. Last time I saw her. We had sushi that night (tying it in with the previous posters).

Weird, weird girl.

Obviously she was just checking to see if she’d given you The Herpes yet.

[Moore]

Sake never hurts, though.

Eh, sake can hurt you. TRUST ME.

[Kunikos]

That would actually make it less gross than the idea of mayo on corn.

I’m not sure which is more disgusting, slathering corn with mayo or it figuring into Whitta’s bukkake dreams.

[Dirt]

It’s not the kind of alcohol you drink. It’s the quality of the alcohol itself that hurts you.

[Kunikos]

Eh, sake can hurt you. TRUST ME.

Sake doesn’t hurt people. People hurt people.

[Moore]

People who make and serve Sake. Yeah.

I do love sake, I’ve just gotten super duper durnk off of it once, and while wine hangovers are BAD (and stupid since wine is more or less nasty), sake hangovers are the devil.

[jeffd]

contrarybear: Sounds cool, I’ll definitely poke around here for a sushi class.

And yeah, bags reminds me of myself circa 19-20. I was a total judgemental ass about people who just wanted to get drunk and be idiots. Then I gave it a try, had fun, and got over it.

[Gary_Whitta]

I was as clueless as extar at his age too, so yeah there is hope for us all.

[ElGuapo]

Wait, how old is extarbags? I was assuming late twenties.

If he’s 19, my god, why does this thread even exist?

[Moore]

I behaved like I’m imagining he behaves. When I was like 15-16.

It’s a bit more fun to have a beer.

[JPR]

I think he’s like 24.

[Kunikos]

He’s far too old to act so young. I went through that “don’t really want to drink” phase when I was the same age as Moore mentions. Then I discovered Corona Extra and the sticky-icky and it was all downhill from there.

[Lunch_of_Kong]

Obviously she was just checking to see if she’d given you herpes yet.

Wow. That is so evil, I’m embarrassed I didn’t think of it first.

[Moore]

Wow. That is so evil, I’m embarrassed I didn’t think of it first.

I was surprised I was the first to post it myself.