Gods of Egypt - Flopped so hard it made baby Anubis cry

I guess we didn’t have a thread for this bomb.

Alex Proyas directing. Starring Gerad Butler, Rufus Sewell, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Geoffrey Rush, Brenton Thwaites, Chadwick Boseman, and Elodie Yung.

Let’s start with the accusations of whitewashing that resulted in separate apologies from the director and the studio back when the trailer first popped out.

From there, we can move to the dismal launch weekend box office: $14 million with an estimated budget of $140 million. Reviews are negative. Thankfully for investors, the studio’s exposure was only $10 million thanks to foreign pre-sales and a 46% production incentive from the Australian government.

Finally, Alex Proyas is busting out movie critics on Facebook.

a 46% production incentive from the Australian government.

“We need our own Lord of the Rings franchise like New Zealand got! Start indiscriminately throwing money at expensive “epic” move productions!”

Dude. Way to talk about your own movie!

Don’t leave out the next sentence. It’s so good!

Now we have a pack of diseased vultures pecking at the bones of a dying carcass. Trying to peck to the rhythm of the consensus.

The best thing about Gods of Egypt is the epic blurb on Rotten Tomatoes.

Look on Gods of Egypt, ye filmgoers, and despair! Nothing beside remains. Round the decay of this colossal wreck, boundless and bare. The lone and level sands stretch far away. (Apologies to Shelley.)

I guess this means we won’t be seeing the planned sequel, Gods of New Jersey.

Man, I only saw the commercials but it looked like your typical CGI shitshow. The money shot of some winged dude flying around did absolutely nothing except remind me that CG artists need to work for food.

It honestly looked like one of those direct-to-video movies you’d see in Blockbuster back in the day.

I didn’t get it. I watched the trailer and, CGI shit-show aside, my first thought was “Haven’t we been here before, not even that long ago, with that Christian Bale Exodus debacle?”

How stupid are the people running these things? Glad it flopped.

I’d watch anything with Elodie Yung in it. Even a turd. Especially a turd.

When the movies start rolling in, it’s not unusual for me to see 2-3 a month. I had no interest in this. It looked terrible. It was definitely whitewashed. Some teenage romance or something… like the Mummy without any of the fun.

This looked terrible, but I had no idea that it was directed by the guy who did The Crow and Dark City, which are both great. (Also the really unfaithful adaptation of I, Robot that was kind of entertaining anyway, I guess? Huh.) How the mighty have fallen, I guess.

How did the director of The Crow and Dark City crap out this turd?

EDIT - HA, good timing on our posts there!

I’ll echo everyone else on Proyas. Between I, Robot and then Knowing and now this…good lord. It’s as if he’s channeling the career of Billy Friedkin.

Oh I didn’t realize Proyas had gone on a rant about critics because of the flop.

Link

White washing aside, there were a lot of things that didn’t appeal to me from that trailer. I didn’t even care what the critics said.

Nothing better than a good director anti-critic rant. It’s not like it wasn’t an obvious turkey from the trailer.

Looking forward to the inevitable Flop House episode about it though!

When do we get to Alex Proyas’ Killer Joe? :)

-Tom

To me, this is the worst part of the whole thing. Whoever greenlit this turd, ie, all the executive tone deaf money grubbing a-holes who think they have the pulse on what’s new and hot, barely get dinged in this trainwreck, while tax payers are footing the bill. Sure, several millions went into a few local jobs, but seriously, if the Australian government had taken all that money and handed it to local filmakers, they could have made 5 or 6 films that actually spoke to the population in an honest way, and maybe paved the way for new talent the way one vapid ‘epic’ will never. Hindsight being 20/20 and all that, but Ex-Machina was made for a paltry 15 mil.

Anyway, I’m as sad as anybody the director of DarkCity, one of my favorite movies, isn’t doing well, but I reacted the same way everyone else did to that trailer… dear god was it bad (and I’m jonesing for new IP vfx-y films to knock Marvel down, tired as I am of them)

I’ve heard it is so bad, it might actually be good! As in a classic of the future in the way Plan 9 from out of space and others became? I’ve even heard it might be the worst movie ever made, which might be as good as an Oscar?

I think some consider the worst movie ever made to be Jerry Lewis’ holocaust film The Day the CLown Cried, which is so bad the only way anyone can watch it is if we wait another ten years, in [Jerry’s] hope of him dying before he ever has to experience the mainstream reaction to it firsthand.