Good USB soundbars out there?

This is the same court that said that Italian scientists were guilty of manslaughter for failing to warn people about an earthquake.

Their convictions were later overturned, thankfully, but I’m not about to accept an Italian court’s opinions about what is and isn’t science.

My biggest concern right now is trying to find out exactly how much extra EM radiation my monitor releases after I’ve drilled mounting holes through the screen.

Lol this guy reminds me of the Puppeteers from Ringworld

Are there any good Bluetooth soundbars? (For what values of good?).

Really? You are acting like the OP came in here like some Jehova witness trying to spread the word, while there was just one little sentence in the original post indicating why he, personally, wanted something other than Bluetooth. He didn’t start this discussion, you did.

In the realm of “weird things people believe about audio equipment”, concerns about Bluetooth radiation doesn’t even crack the top 50.

Now, if you excuse me, I’m going to go listen to some nice warm vinyl on my platinum coated cables.

Dude, don’t drill through the screen. The glass does not have enough structural integrity. I would suggest something solid like capacitors or power supply.

It isn’t really whether or not it is true, but just that let people buy what they want for whatever reason. If you look up reviews of the original thing he had, it seemed a quirky but well regarded product that has no obvious successor (it’s literally a little speaker you clip to your laptop’s screen), so his dislike of Bluetooth is incidental to his question.

The Puppeteers were geniuses. No need to insult them here.

But absolute cowards…

Will my Lumia give me cancer?

Yes. But what of it? In their society it is a virtue. It is, after all, a survival trait. And when pushed, they will fight. Either by spinning around and gutting you with a hind leg, or with weapons unknown to you. Or by hiring someone else to get rid of you. So you might say that they are Mostly Cowards. :)