Happy Administrative Professionals Day

For those who?s job description includes jammed staplers and lying to everyone about the whereabouts of your boss.

For the tender souls whose wills have been crushed by power-hungry middle management.

For those who will may receive today, as paltry compensation, a paperweight or a slice of cake. (Where the hell is my cake???)

For us, the administrative professionals of the world, who wear our polyester slacks on our legs and our quiet desperation on our sleeves, I offer this simple prayer:

“Please God, don?t let this be the rest of my life.”

Please buy a secretary a drink today.

Happy secretaries’ day to all of you, and I hope your bosses show appreciation. Mine got flowers and a gift card from the firm, and I’m taking her to a long lunch.

Man, this comes in at 3:57 EST! Too late!

Sorry, but what the hell is this “day” anyways. Why isn’t there a project manager day. I put up with enough shit as well.

Because everyone despises project managers.

I sprang for Dairy Queen, lunch is tomorrow because big boss forgotted. I had to warn a bunch of other lawyers that it was today.

True dat! I hate myself as well.

Come talk to me when there is an “IT Manager’s Day” where the company lets me surf porn and play online games all day long in appreciation for putting up with their idiotic shit the other 364 days of the year. Bitter? Hell yeah I’m bitter.


I’ll give my sexetary a special present!