Good luck to the Widsoms! Much love and positive energy shooting out from the Elhajj house!
If you google Elhajj shooting love animated gif, this is one of the top hits:
Good luck to you and your wife Tin!
Having about a golf ball worth of mass (not anything sinister, just built-up crusties because that’s my life now) pulled out of my nose with pliers just does not set me up for a good day.
Back up in Minnesota - my dad’s health went in the shitter rapidly yesterday wasn’t eating/drinking. He did a little so overnight and today but now has almost no lucid moments other than occasional smiles to comments. We think he may only have a day or two left at the rate this is progressing, so I’m up here through the weekend at least.
Honestly, the quicker this goes the better. It’s hardly even my dad anymore. Brain cancer is truly horrific.
Best wishes Vesper. That’s crappy.
On our end, everything went about as well as could be hoped for – the surgery was without any complications, and in fact they were able to get away with only two lymphatic drains rather than the three that they had prepared us for. Ms. Wisdom was in the OR for about three and a half hours followed by a couple hours in the recovery room. They wheeled her into the overnight room at about the six-hour mark and she was awake and in good spirits. I left her an hour or so back so she could get some sleep.
Including check-in, it was about a nine-hour thing. That’s a pretty long day, especially for my 14-year-old daughter, who managed to get all her homework for the next two weeks completed during the wait while juggling a baker’s dozen text and snapchat conversations and also typing up lengthy status reports on “CaringBridge”. Kids.
The best news was that the three “sentinel” lymph nodes that they pulled from under her left arm were small and squishy… which is exactly how lymph node ought to be if you pull them out of your body (not recommended). So, barring some bad news from the pathology report on the tumor itself, it’s looking like no chemotherapy. Which is great.
But fuck cancer anyway.
Hugs man, Tyjenks.
And Tin, that’s great news. Hopefully things come back clear.
I cannot hug all you folks enough, particularly Vesper, Tyjenks, and the whole Wisdom family. If you’re anything like me, this holiday season can be particularly difficult when Bad Stuff is happening in your life (like last year, when my grandma passed right around Christmas). If all the extra expectations of being cheerful and merry for the holidays gets to you, don’t hesitate to be somewhat less social than usual. People will understand.
Vesper, here’s hoping for peace for you all sooner rather than later.
Tin, I have started holding onto the good stuff that comes out of this shit like a life preserver. It’s still fucked up, but after weeks, months of reports that break your heart and mind, positive results are good.
We made an appointment yesterday to get wills/living wills sewed up. All my wife’s idea. I am in awe of her strength and ability to say “This is how it is. I can control my attitude and outlook. I cannot control the cancer or how the chemo works. So I am going to be in a good mood and deal with this.” I would not say before she was particularly mentally strong or weak, but this is beyond all frame of reference for me with her and other people I have known who have dealt with crises.
ANd thanks again to everyone for their hugs and to Tom and all of you for this space in which to vent a little. I went and met with a couple of counselors yesterday so I can move forward and and the family can in dealing with “the new normal” of indefinite treatment and side effects.
EDIT: And prayers for Adam’s nose. ;)
Vesper, missed yours in the page switch. Big hugs for you. I hope your family gets peace soon. Brain cancer is really horrific, especially at the end. All the best for you and your family.
Tyjenks, I’ve got to say that both you and your wife sound like really impressive, high-quality people. Cancer has thrown your kids a pile of shit, but they’re fortunate you guys are holding everything together for them.
My dad passed away today surrounded by family. I’m glad he’s not suffering from this terrible disease anymore but man this sucks.
Damn, man. I just went back and read your posts on the previous page. I went through a similar thing with my dad about 2 years ago. 2 months from diagnosis to death. “At least it was quick” works on an intellectual level, but it is still your dad and it hit me like a ton of bricks. Hang in there and hold the good stuff in your heart.
Vesper, condolences to you and your family. Yeah, I’m sure some time from now you’ll look back and be glad the pain is over for your Dad, but I’m guessing that right now you’re just absorbing that he’s actually gone and a piece of you is gone with him. So sorry for your loss.
Deepest condolences, Vesper. When my father in law passed earlier this year, the best advice I heard to was live in the moment, experience the pain, mourn the loss, and remember the good times. You’re in my thoughts.
Please let us know if there’s anything the rest of us can do for you or your family.
Very sorry for you Vesper.
Vesper, you have my sympathies. It sucks. As Kemper says, intellectually the suffering being over doesn’t take the sting out of it being your dad. I’m glad the family could be there for him.
I’m sorry to hear it Vesper. I hope everything goes as well as possible for you and your family in the coming days.
Terrible, just terrible. You have my sympathy, Vesper. It’s just a hard spot to be in. Good luck to you and your family in the coming days and weeks.
Deepest condolences Vesper.
Best wishes.