I’m pretty sure I need some stress coaching as I don’t react particularly well to it. For example, after a stressful day at work I need to go to gym or I just end up being insufferably grumpy at home which leads to domestic friction. Or shitty posts on QT3.
I’m in the boat of people who deal with stress badly. I used to be great at handling stress but the behaviors I used to rely on to manage it, namely smoking and extended bouts of SP gaming, are not compatible with my current lifestyle as a parent.
So add me to the list of people looking for good tips :)
You just have to learn to let it go. My Dad died young, at 53. He went into casualty with a headache and was told he had six months to live, and he died six months later.
He and my mother took two holidays a year for almost the entire last 20 years of their marriage, and I think about, if they’d waited, until they retired or maybe had more savings, they wouldn’t have done any of it. They wouldn’t have seen Pavarotti at La Scala or been to the Stadium of Light to see Milan, and my Da would have gone nowhere and died at 53.
So, taking a quick shortcut across Metaphor Avenue, the lesson I learned is that life is basically meaningless, and so I work hard to enjoy every day because I might die tomorrow. That splash of cold water means I don’t waste my time feeling stress, I just let it go.
In good weather, a LONG bike ride (in the woods, or on bikepaths) works wonders - exercise in general is excellent therapy for stress. I generally put on some great (but semi-repetitive) music like Underworld, and get cranking. Often, if I can, I do night rides during the summer on bikepaths, when nobody’s there - I get into a meditative state where I feel like I’m literally floating above the ground, zooming along the path. Meanwhile, my body is burning tons of calories, and getting me ready for a tasty meal.
In the winter, I don’t do as well, but I play more games and go out for more drinks…:)
Deep breathing techniques, quality time with my kids, quality time to myself for gaming and reading, small things like that all help to alleviate the stress of a normal lifestyle.
Then, every 2 or 3 months, I pick a particularly annoying person I’ve met through an internet forum, I research everything there is to know about them, I travel to their location, I shadow them for about 48 hours or so, then, when the time is right, I strike. Everyone else in the forum just assumes they’ve been banned, only myself and the families know the awful truth.
Find a place you can be alone, close your eyes and breath deeply. Concentrate on nothing but your breathing… deep in, and deep out. After a few seconds of this begin counting your breaths. Think of nothing save your breathing and the counting, let every other conscious thought wash away and just breath, and count. If you find your mind wandering in any way at all… restart the count. You likely won’t be able to count very high like this at first, but the longer you do it the farther you’ll get because you’ll be calming yourself down and getting more centered.
The purpose of all this is to focus your thinking to the point of not letting anything from out there get in while you’re meditating… and yes, that’s what you’re doing.
You can do this anywhere really, but someplace you can be unobserved and alone is best… the shitter at the office would work nicely, though keep your long deep breaths quiet. :)
Yeah man, that hippie shit never did anything for me. I need an outlet for the rage, not a way to cram it in to a small black ball in the pit of my stomach. It’s let it out now harmlessly, or let it out later destructively.