Somehow, I wound up doing a bunch of hardware reviews. I’ve spent a measurable fraction of today opening controllers, and in so doing, shredding my hands into fucking confetti.
Short of firing up a chainsaw, have any of you figured out a decent way to get a third-party controller’s box open without causing yourself lasting harm? If there’s a way you’re supposed to open them, I’ve yet to find it.
I find alchol usually does the trick, with a little rohypnol if it’s really stubborn.
(In all seriousness, if it’s the plastic heat soldered type, ignore the edges entirely, and use a sharp blade, preferably something like an exacto knife, to slice their inside edges, letting you peel off the back cover of the packaging. It’s the ripping that usually ends up causing the damage to your hands, producing sharp edges as the plastic tears and shears. If you find that you’re still getting cut up as you do this even using a good knife, get a pair of work gloves for protection. The decrease in dexterity shouldn’t be a problem.)
Yeah, get your utility knife from the toolbox and just be careful carving either the back or around the shape of the controller on the front. That’s definitely the easiest way to open plasteel packaging.
Good sturdy knife. Motion carried.
I keep a little lockback pocketknife on my keychain (and get irritated the day I have to fly anywhere, because I might use that one-inch instrument of cold steel to TAKE OVER THE WORLD but the TSA prevents me from doing so), and it makes such things much easier.
I just use scissors. They’re not as good as a knife, but it gets the job done. BTW does anyone know why these are so annoying to open?
I use my kitchen shears.
Shit can cut through a turkey bone, why not sealed plastic?
It’s devil plastic :ph34r:
My guesses, in increasing order of cynicism:
Marketing/Stacking – translucent plastic looks better on the shelf, shows the item, is space efficient and easy to dangle from metal spokes. The annoyance of the packaging is a side effect of the process that just happens to accomplish the above requirements best.
Theft control – small items can be made much larger, making them more visible and harder to steal. It’s easy to embed a anti-theft strip in an plastic package that is very hard to open. It’s a problem the user has to deal with, but not until they’ve paid up.
Return prevention – If the packaging is damaged on a returned item, some stores will charge restocking/remaindering fees. So, make the package impossible to open without damaging it.
And all that time I was thinking, why would anybody open a controller to review it. That’s going a bit far.
But, you’re talking about the damn blisterpacks
if you are reviewing them, just dont even opent the package and say ‘painful painful packaging prevents usage, 0/10’ until they fucking stop using it.
Can anyone trade a few coins for an exacto knife +1?? My plastic butter knife is clearly immune to the sealed barricade surrounding the logitech action wireless controller.
Also join my guild! KTHXBYE!
Tin snips do a fine job around our house. Just cut straight across the top and usually you can separate them.
I always thought they were called “blister packs”.
<insert penny-arcade laser beam comic reference here>
Scissors if they’re sharp enough… otherwise I find the biggest knife I can and throw it repeatedly at the box until it’s damaged enough to remove the soft, controllery center.
…and yet, that would be good info for guys that hack their controllers.
I have this scary sharp Japanese boning knife (ooh, vicar) that does the trick…when it isn’t slowly reducing my extremities to bloody, painful nubs.
I used to use my Kitchen Scissors, but the effort was actually blunting them. It’s like they’ve decided to package the controllers in some new sentient form of Super Plastic, capable of adapting and circumventing any futile attempt at reaching the sweet sweet controllery goodness inside.
I use my pair of kitchen shears.
Clip the corners big enough to insert your fingers and pull it apart.
get something you can control well, ie scissors etc. utility and X-acto knives cut nice but all of a sudden they’ll slice through much faster than you expect and then its off to stitches and the Percodan factory…