How do you "teach" creationism?

Is there a process other than pointing to the Bible?

Begin with an idiotic delusion that should make all human beings living in this century wince with shared racial shame. Attempt to strong-arm the rest of the world into sharing it with you. Not notice the irony that one of the big arguments is ‘God put fake dinosaur fossils in as a test of faith, but all the stupid stuff in the Bible is his Sacred Word’.

Oh. And insist that all evolution textbooks, espousing a theory that science would by its very nature correct over time if it proved to be bullshit, be stickered up with stuff about it being merely a theory, but scream the whole fucking roof down if anyone tries to do the same thing with theirs.

Me, I’m sticking with the idea that we all live on the drippings of Ymir’s corpse. If it was good enough for the Vikings, goshdarnit, it’s durn good enough for me.

Teach? I believe the word you’re looking for is ‘indoctrinate’.

Try to get Evolution removed from school textbooks, watered down, defunded, etc. Expose kids to watered down Evolution theories on your own time, and ingrain the creationist “refutations”. Try to reframe the issue to put Evolution in a bad light.

Pretty straight forward really. Much the same approach is used to teach kids any worldview. I know I do essentially similar things on the other end of the spectrum as an agnostic believer in Evolution. I fight the teaching of Creationism in public school (deserves equal time my ass!), make sure my kids are exposed enough to the prevailing religions to “innoculate” them, and take every shot I can to reframe Creationists in a bad light.

But but…nature could never come up with something like the Angler Fish!!!

How to teach creationism- watch the Simpsons episode with Homer as Atom.

Hmm, I guess you just take advantage of the inherent contradictions in a system of “public” schooling to force your delusions on others.

It’s just a theory. It’s just a theory. It’s just a theory. It’s just a the…

Well, since Intelligent Design is just a workaround for Christians to get the bible inside schools without dealing with the whole seperation of church and state annoyance in the Constitution, the best thing any teacher forced to teach creationism could do, would to give any other mythology equal billing as Christianity.

Aztecs, buddhists and aboriginees all have way cooler myths than the christians. And since the Christians is pretending it has nothing to do with teaching the bible, but is just a way to let schoolchildren know that evolution is just a theory and that there’s other valid theories out there, the teacher could really get creative.

In the beginning the universe was created.

This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

Many races believe that it was created by some sort of god, though the Jatravartid people of Viltvodle VI believe that the entire Universe was in fact sneezed out of the nose of a being called the Great Green Arkleseizure.

The Jatravartids, who live in perpetual fear of the time they call The Coming of The Great White Handkerchief, are small blue creatures with more than fifty arms each, who are therefore unique in being the only race in history to have invented the aerosol deodorant before the wheel.

I miss this man’s wit.

Intelligent design is as big an embarrassment to rational Christians (they’re out there!) as to Darwinian folks. John Derbyshire wrote an excellent piece on it in this last (paper) National Review, and it has stirred up a real hornet’s next amongst the pseudoscience clans.

Derb is so bizarre. I can see having a perfectly fun dinner conversation with him, but the man is somewhat insane.