How Tall Is Bear Grylls?...Wait, What the @#*! Did He Name His Kids?

So we were watching “Man Vs. Wild Top 25 Moments” tonight and my wife asked me a seemingly innocent question: How Tall Is Bear Grylls? You see, here theory was that he moves so quickly and is so agile that he must be small and compact. So I look on Wikpedia. but before I could find the answer, i saw this and it stopped me in my tracks:

“Grylls married Shara Grylls in 2000. They have three sons: Jesse, Marmaduke, and Huckleberry

Unless that is some kind of Wikipedia joke, the last two must be very very jealous of the first one. All apologies to anyone here whose real name is Marmaduke or Huckleberry. By the way, Bear Grylls is 6 feet tall

“How Tall is Bear?” is a great children’s book title, and apparently it hasn’t been taken since the #1 hit on Google is this thread.

How many whales are there?

Jesse, Duke and Huck. What’s the problem?

I know a guy who named his 3 kids after LOTR characters.

— Alan says 6’0", tending a touch lower.

He’s agile because he’s a ninja!

That didn’t help him much against the bees.

Bees are the greatest martial artists of them all.

Oh gawd… seriously? He practices ‘Ninjutsu’? Does he focus his inner chi, too?

Les Stroud is so much cooler then him in every way.

I respect Les more, but the dude is boring as hell. Bear is much cooler than Les as far as personality goes

I knew a lady who named her daughters after Doctor Who companions: Tegan & Nyssa.

As far as celebrity kid names go, those are pretty tame.

I shouldn’t be surprised there is an entire website devoted to this kind of information, but I am.

Who is driving? Oh my God, Bear Grylls is driving! How can that be?

Those are extremely tame names in comparison to calling your child Aragorn.

— Alan

If I have another child, I am going to name her Bullhajj. Bullhajj “Chick” Elhajj.

Do siblings of celebrities count, Have you guys heard of Rooster, Matthew McConaughey’s brother, and his kids names?

Miller Lyte & Margarita Olympia.

Whoa, whoa, wait a tick. It’s what he names his children that makes you think “Hey, this Bear guy is a bit ridiculous?” This is after you’ve seen him give himself a fetid water enema? The man is a preposterous eccentric. I can’t even fathom what he’s like in real life. It’s like trying to picture a video game character living in our reality.

I tried to watch Survivorman but just couldn’t. “Hi I’m Les Stroud. Watch me starve and get dehydrated. Isn’t this exciting?” At least Man vs. Wild is fun in a Jackass kind of way.“Oh look, a hundred foot frozen cliff. Let’s try to climb down instead of finding a way around!”