If you had to live in a video game

Consider whatever scenario you’d like. A mad scientist. A Tron-like accident. A burp in the universe that throws you into one of the infinite parallel planes.

Whatever the case, you now exist in a video game of your choosing.

Which is it and why?


  • It may be fun to smash like the Hulk, but you’re green, you don’t have friends, you’re constantly hunted and there’s little chance that even a yoga master can “accommodate” you. Consider the pros and cons.

  • Your favorite games may not make a preferred new “reality.” Running, shooting and constantly looking for life and power-ups may make for a stressful life. Or may simply make you a New Yorker.

  • Your least favorite games may make for a preferred new “reality.” Three words: Leisure Suit Larry. Think about it.

  • Few games provide for Maslow’s hierarchy. And whether in this world or the next, who doesn’t want to become a self-actualized being?

Secret of Monkey Island.


Fallout. Or maybe Painkiller.

Leather Godesses of Phobos

I almost said that. Or Knights of Xentar.

Gentlemen, you’re dating yourselves.

Myst series. If forced to choose one, Uru.

Myst or Grim Fandango.

Yeah, we’re old… but cool and hip to you youngsters games, yo!

I’m surprised that Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball has yet to make the list.

Leisure Suit Larry, any of them.

If Larry can get laid in those by assembling a condom out of saran wrap, a cat whisker, and a strawberry… Anyone can.

Probably some Star Trek adventure or sim that has a holodeck. The holodeck’s for when I get bored of the world I’m in and want to check out a new game. Even Leisure Suit Larry.

Err: I guess that’s a clever line but not a good answer. I guess, probably, Morrowind. Nice little places to settle down and people to talk to (if repetatively so). Maybe a MMO would be better for more interaction, say, SWG. Get my own house, my own ship and can decide just how exciting or not I want any given day to be.

Fallout 2. Strolling around a post-nuclear-holocaust landscape in power armor with my posse of freaks, doing good and helping to rebuild society. Though the whole fall-of-civilization thing might be a downer after a while.

Elite. High-tech enough to please my inner SF geek, but not so squeaky-clean as to be boring or where most of the planets look like the third world.

(Edit: Though if I actually had to ‘be’ the game and strike out into space on my own, I’d probably be dead within a week.)

Dead Rising.

Half Life 2. Down with the Combine!

Final Fantasy X.

Sure, it was kind of a mediocre game, but man, JRPGs have the most idyllic seaside villages ever.

I’m torn between Fallout and Syndicate.

Either Pirates! or Wing Commander: Privateer. Probably Pirates!, since Privateer doesn’t have the option to cavort with governors’ daughters.