Iranian fleet approaching!

Oh no!

It seems a lot of people have an interest in promoting Iran as scary aggressors. Even USA Today reports the headline Iran says warships headed close to U.S. borders. Yet within the article, they say:

That’s it? That’s your fleet? One little old destroyer and a supply ship? For pity’s sake. Many other American news organs likewise report the imminent advent of the “fleet” without bothering to specify its composition at all. Even Al Jazeera is on board:

So it’s a joke, but it appears to be a mutual one promoted by all sides. The Iranians are pretending they are sending a “fleet”, American news outlets pretend the same thing, and so does the Sunni press. It’s like a sort of happy propaganda conspiracy.

To be fair, the US military is trying to play this down. The only response they have given is a terse (and correct) statement of “ships are free to operate in international waters.”

At last the American Empire is at an end! Tremble, Americans, tremble and repent!

Er, okay, maybe not.

EDIT: I checked some Canadian media here, and there’s not a single mention of this.

Next up, on Fox News: the imminent threat posed by the Royal Liechtensteinian Army!

That depends on whether Luxembourg honours its alliance with them.

Quick, build more Triremes!

Reminds me of the scenes in Canadian Bacon, where they point out that 90% of Canada’s population has been massed within a hundred miles of the U.S. border…

Shhhhh! Yes of course! If the powers in Iran don’t do a “strong response” they look weak and no one wants that (just look at Putin’s silly photo ops). No “conspiracy”, just straight up posturing. And clearly one with no teeth, and likely intentionally toothless with current negotiations. But the propaganda for mostly internal Iranian, and maybe a little regional standing (“standing up to” the US makes you look better) as it’s sole intent. Yep, the goal is to get the newspapers to report that in BIG SCARY LETTERS! Most Iranians will get the fact its a posture too, its for play to a specific crowd there. This is why the US military is correctly responding with “Oh yeah that, whatever …”.

Please don’t point out their fleet is small, its like … oh calling their penis small or something.

Oh, and when your own government says something stupid, or proposes loudly an aggressive course of action that we hope they, and we know most of the people inside country know is silly, in order to pander to a specific group … can we call that propaganda too? Though this, like that is I guess more “pandering”.

Its the negotiations. The current leaders seem to really want to make some kind of deal on negotiations right now, and such deal must include the US. But they can’t afford to look at all like they are remotely friendly with the US, they have some pretty good current political realities and historical reasons for that. So expect more of the quiet negotiations and BOLD SCARY "Marg Bar Amrika! headlines whenever they can fit them to not look weak or even remotely pro-US. I wonder what the next “provocation” will be?

Dude, the Coast Guard could probably sink those things if it came down to it.

Yawn. But I imagine Fox and Friends will hammer the war drums or something. Nevermind that we pretty much keep an aircraft carrier or two steaming outside of Iran’s waters 24/7, 365.

Or The Mouse that Roared, in which a tiny broke country where the longbow is still the most efficient weapon declares war on the US just so as to surrender and qualify for Marshall Plan aid (yes, it’s very dated), but for some reason the expeditionary force gets to New York during an evacuation exercise and gets its hand on a nuclear bomb prototype, leading the US to surrender to it.

Forward Grand Fenwick! ;)