Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom - The raptors ride the motorcycles this time


Sure I mean he was fine, I certainly didn’t dislike him in Guardians. I just feel like Chris Evans could have done just as well. Or Chris Hemsworth. Or Chris Pine. Any Chris, I guess.


I suddenly have a desire to see Chris(topher) Walken in one of these movies. Or Chris(topher) Plummer.


Oh man, don’t get me started. What’s Chris Sarandon up to these days?


Christien Murkawski, Chris Marquardson, Chris Schmidt…


This is popular on /r/movies right today


Thank you. I had a fairly extreme dislike for what happened with those two characters. This explains what I was thinking in better ways than I ever could. Gonna share that. Also, Ripley is still awesome.


The new trailer’s out, I’m underwhelmed. By the books running from one place to another, dodging dinos. It’s as if they’ve designed a movie where understanding English is not a barrier for entry. Worldwide sensation guaranteed, I guess.

Gaddammit, I really wanted my mechanized velociraptor drone squad kicking ass in Afghanistan. Or my genetically altered human with raptor head. I really thought they’d go there after the last one was playing with splicing new species and having the raptors as a unit. Oh well.


I guess it’s a good thing the dinos from the previous movie rampaged and shut down the park before a volcano would just happen along and kill a lot more visitors.


“These creatures were here before us…”

Uh… Not only were these particular creatures created in a lab by us, they’re not even 1-to-1 copies of real dinosaurs since we gave them traits that were for showbiz reasons.


The original JP took great care to dispel myths about dinosaurs being slow, dumb and graceless by bringing on board paleontologists to show us how they likely looked and behaved. So it’s ironic that once our understanding of their appearance changed, the franchise decided to become the very thing they were essentially mocking in the first movie.

I’m sure we’d all love to see a new take on these dinosaurs, a 5 year old could write some explanation for it into the script. It would certainly have made the trailer less boring.


That pretty much captures my feelings about Jurassic World. It’s one of the most wretched, immoral blockbusters outside of a Transformers movie. I couldn’t give any fucks about a sequel.


The trailer didn’t even bother to stage an awesome Goldblum reveal, which leads me to believe he’s in the movie for about three minutes. A shame; he’s the only reason I had any interest in this.


I forgot where I read it, but Goldblum said his part is so small, he wasn’t sure if his scenes would even make the final cut.


Which means we probably already saw it.

They put a expensive theme park with a bunch of priceless dinosaurs on an island with a volcano large enough to destroy everything… if only we knew if volcanic eruptions might have had adverse effects for prehistoric lizards.


They were trying to make it as “realistic” as possible!


Will we finally get a Triceratops vs. Tyrannosaurus? God, I miss Harryhausen.

Man, that trope of the scary carnivore suddenly getting grabbed by a somehow-hidden-offscreen-but-even-bigger carnivore is getting really fucking tired. FFS it’s the end of the original Jurassic Park, the end of Jurassic World, twice in 5 minutes in Phantom Menace, etc.


Has it really only happened those two times? When I saw it in the trailer it already felt like the fifth or sixth time the franchise has done that. Tired indeed.


I can’t even watch that stupid Jedi submarine sequence without getting irritated again. It was so stupid for them to do that two times in a row like that. And for this one, it’s not even a surprise. It’s in the trailer, spoiling the bigger fish thing in a trailer might be a first.


Hey it was worth it for the Captain Obvious Qui-gon Jinn quip: “there is always a bigger fish”.



You’re really militant about this bio-engineering thing, huh?