Love, Hannity Style

It’s true. Sean Hannity is trying his hand as matchmaker with Hannidate 2005, a dating service hosted on his Web site. If you’ve always been curious about romance, right-wing style, here’s what you’ve been missing:


Name: Mark
Location: ?
Age: 49

I am a 49 year old truck driver. Divorced, one daughter, 18, looking for a LADY, 45 to 55 years old, no tatoos, no body piercings except ears, but most importantly NOT LIBERAL (lady and not liberal kind of go hand in hand, don’t they?).


Name: Dave
Location: OR
Age: 40

My name is Dave, 40 years old, 6-1, 200 lbs, single, I live and work in Junction City, Oregon… yes there are nice, smart… red people that live around Eugene Oregon! All I want from this is to kill deer with Ann Coulter someday…


Name: Krista
Location: MI
Age: 36

I love this country and I support our President. I saw him three times this past year, twice on the campaign trail and once at the inauguration. I cried when Reagan died…one of my favorite books is “I love you, Ronnie” - Ronald Reagan’s love letters to Nancy Reagan. I want the kind of love that Nancy and Ronald Reagan had…

They claim these are not parodies. Either way, I’m laughing my ass off! :lol:

Here’s a link to the actual thing:

This has to be a joke, right? Right?

crickets chirp

About as big a joke as this.

I bet you they won’t kill Bambi, though!

This chick looks the cutest, but she certainly has high standards. Women with high standards never liked me for some reason.


No, but they will make you eat hummus.

I would have to say to her: “I’m just a Buddhist looking for some Bootay! Man is the master! Obey, me, chattel!” She should be really horny at that point…

(Reply to Twain about conservative, Christian woman with high standards who likes to be dominated.)

No, but they will make you eat hummus.[/quote]


“I’m currently learning how to like reading”


Reading is bad mkay, unless its a bible and you can overlook the contradictory bits.

Might give you wierd ideas about stuff otherwise.

Some of these are hilarious.

“All I want from this is to kill deer with Ann Coulter someday.”

Dream a little dream, Dave!

And with that post, I prove that I’m an idiot who doesn’t read the first post in threads!

I would too, so I could have a little hunting “accident”.

Agreed, she’s gorgeous, but…

He would have to be first and foremost, a Christian. In addition, he must demonstrate the following qualities in no particular order: intelligence, good judgment, leadership, honesty, responsibility, sensitivity, tenderness, excitement, romance, good humor, even temperament, creativity, cleaning abilities, cooking abilities, and telepathy (for when I’m mad at him). (* List of character qualities may increase without notice). After passing these tests, I will introduce him to my father, who will no doubt have additional testing which will need to be completed. I think you get the picture :)

She needs to grow the hell up. Too bad all that Christian Republicanism is messing up her mind with unrealistic expectations. :P

In addition, he must demonstrate the following qualities in no particular order: intelligence…

But I thought she said she wanted a Christian. Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week.

“I’m currently learning how to like reading”


Well, looks like we got ourselves a reader.