2761

Got beat by the AI for the first time this season. My offensive line is just evil bad and they could not stop a blitz to save their life. Lost two or three fumbles with Freeman, then when I got behind, threw a couple of iffy INTs. Continued to out pass my opponent in yards, but unable to find that place called the endzone more than not.

Can not wait until next season. First order of business is to play a team with a good oline. ;)

That said, really curious how these playoffs are going to go. Some real power house teams in there.

2762

Hey Robb, I’ll be out of town most of the week and can only play this Wednesday or next Wednesday, so any time you’re available on one of those days I’ll make time for us to play. Lemme know.

2763

Is Childan going to get his game in against the Packers? I don’t think his Panthers will win that game if simmed.

2764

Rolling anyway!

2765

And so we roll into the final week for what I assume will be a pointless Jets-Raiders game. I check out the standings for the end of the season… wait a minute.

AFC East: Miami clinches the division
AFC Jeff: Colts clinch the division.
AFC North: Either Baltimore or Pittsburgh, the other gets the wildcard.
AFC West: San Diego clinches the division.

The last wildcard slot? Well, the Chiefs are at 9-6. The Jets are at 8-7. The Jets have a win over the Chiefs. So if the Jets win and the Chiefs lose… holy crap, we could somehow stumble into the playoffs.

Even still, I am trepidatious as we take the field… wait, what’s #6 doing jumping up and down with a torn shoulder labrum?

Pause, Coach menu, Medical…

NO INJURIES.

Praise be to the Flying Spaghetti Monster, Mark Sanchez has been touched by his noodly appendage and HEALED! Let’s go to the kickoff!

This happens.

So, that’s a commanding 7-0 lead after 0:07…

They go three and out, punt. We take the ball, drive for a FG. They take the kick, go three and out, punt. We fumble it away! They fumble it right back! We drive up the field, drop one to Jerricho Cotchery to make it 17-0.

They drive OH NO DARRELLE REVIS INTERCEPTION! We take another FG, 20-0. That brings us to the half.

We receive and kill time on a drive, another FG, 23-0.

They go three and out, punt. We actually punt it back, pinned in our own red zone. But they manage to achieve diddly-schtum and punt it right back. It’s like Aussie Rules out here in Yets Stadium!

So with about four minutes, we futz around with some silly wildcat stuff before lofting what we intend to be a first down fade to Cotchery. That rascal fell into the end zone by mistake. Oh, Jerry. Will you ever learn? 30-0.

We kick it back, ready to see what they can do with a 45 second drive as they take it… ON THE ONE.

They go five wide, and squeak a pass out for a first. Twenty seconds ticking down… ball is lofted up in the air…

OH BRUCE GRADKOWSKI NO.

37-0. And our post-season depends on the outcome of the Vikings-Chiefs game, with both of THOSE teams fighting for post-season spots.

Any given Sunday, folks.

EDIT: Just to give you comparative stats?

Mark Sanchez: 109.3 passer rating.
Bruce Gradkowski: 0.0

That is all.

2766

Zero? That’s possible?

2767

I shit you not. 0.0. 4 of 19, 2 INTs (one for a TD), no TDs, only 51 passing yards.

2768

Oh, wait. Pisser. I need losses by both the Chiefs AND the Patriots, and the Pats have the Cowboys. Goddammit.

2769

Soooo, Ike, when do you want to do this thang?

Thursday night is a possibility for us. Friday and Saturday are right out. Anything else is fair game, though.

2770

Next Wednesday it is!

6pm PST?

2771

Sounds good.

2772

I believe I have plans Friday and Saturday nights, but otherwise I’m pretty much free all weekend, including all day today. My last project ended last week, so I’m currently unemployed and the woman is out of town this weekend, resulting in a perfect storm of gaming availability.

2773

Dolphins, 40-34 in overtime.

The Giants were handing it to us, and had a two-touchdown lead for a while. Wary of risking Brandon Marshall’s health, we let him ride the bench for the entire first half, before putting him in on our first possession of the third quarter. Fortunately, the cart snapped up one of our lower-rated corners, and Brandon was spared injury.

So, one half of production from the guy means 14 receptions for 233 yards and two TDs.

He also led us upfield for a last-minute, no-timeouts-remaining field goal drive to force overtime.

The Giants won the toss in OT, and looked well on their way to winning it, but then this happened.

Run, Karlos, run!

Ike’s a good guy to play against, and I was sure we were going to lose. We were lucky to even get within a field goal of tying it up.

2774

Falcons 42-6 over the cpu Packers. No injuries. That should cinch the conference and a first round bye. Should be interesting to see the matchups in the playoffs.

2775

That ought to help Robb out, then.

I really don’t want to face fuzzy in the playoffs. 544 points for, and only 141 against? That’s amazing! And more than a little daunting!

2776

Just score first. It’ll break his spirit.

2777

Oh, I’ve beaten fuzzy before. I know his game. He’s the only guy in the league who can out-whine me.

2778

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!

2779

Glargh! Very frustrating. So I end the season 8-8 without beating a human player. And yet, that should be enough to take the hapless NFC East. See you in the playoffs!

2780

At least you finished a game up on the actual Seahawks.

Winning a division with an 8-8 record is iffy, but winning it with a 7-9 record? That ain’t right.