My book is on Amazon

Well, it’s not really MY book. I published a bunch of quotes from Internet Quote Databases. It’s nothing flashy, but the quotes are split your sides funny. I’ll be donating a portion of the profits to, which is down right now.

Anyway, any uber geeks on your list will certainly love this marvelous tome with transcripts of people being tortured over IRC.

So, Alex, 15 dollars to be generally amazed at your ability to use Ctrl-C, immediately followed by Ctrl-V?

And out of curiosity, what makes you think those quotes are public domain? They’re generally taken by one or more participants in the conversation without permission - I know all the times someone immortalized one of my verbal assaults, they didn’t ask me if I was cool with it. Seems like you might run into some trouble, using other people’s writing in a for-profit book, without release or permission.

As I said in the intro to the book: the quotes aren’t mine, and they’re not even’s.Copyright is certainly exerted on Bash’s site, but the quotes are all over the Web already. They’re no more exclusive than a good joke.

Also, Amazon chose the price. Not me. And let me tell you, getting a book printed, even if it’s not original content, ain’t a simple affair. Booksurge, the company I used, did everything it could to make this the most painful experience ever.

If everyone hates the price, I’ll sell you a copy for cheaper when my box of copies arrives. QT3 discount. K?

Admit it, you just want some giant blobby dude in a XXXL T-Shirt to have to stand up in court and say “I am Sexygurl15 and those were MY parents with the retractable baton!”

Since it’s a book made up of public domain quotes you don’t mind if I put up a torrent of it right?

Fine with me, but it’d be easier to just go to or and read them there. The whole point of this is to, possibly, somehow, maybe get your old uncle or some non-geek person to laugh at this stuff. I’ve always loved these quotes, and I just could never figure out anyway to get my dad or mom to read the ones I felt were terrific.

I’ll send a free copy to the person who can now generate the snarkiest, meanest comment about my money-grubbing ways.

This isn’t a very supportive environment for young authors. :(

Pfft. You’re not even a smart whore if you’re giving it up for free.

(Snarky enough :-?)

When he actually authors something, I’ll support him.

Geez, tough crowd.

Did any of my penis jokes make it in there? If they did, I"m gonna sue!

Just kidding. Congrats on the book!

You’re being kind of a dick.

I think he just wants a free copy! =)

Yeah, that was a good first effort at a free copy.

Or just a good put-down in general.

Please buy a copy of his book and reward such a lack of effort then. But save some for my forthcoming artistic masterpiece “Google Images - Volume 1” if you pre-order you get a free dog chasing train animated gif flipbook!

I think your follow up should be just a print out of this thread.

I miss Andrew S. Bub pimping GamerDad :(

Dramatic reading audiobook.

“And then a visage of a squirrel appeared. Perched upon a bird feeder it clung to the tenuous handholds with great vigor but it was not to be. For man’s wrath had spun a diabolical scheme from the depths of this garden, and with nary a tear shed the rodent was loosed from his prize.”

I am inspired. Here is an excerpt from my up coming magnum opus “Stats for Presidents That I Stole from 4Chan.”

Stat Grover Cleveland plox.

Size/Type: Medium Humanoid
Hit Dice: 1d8+1(5hp)
Initiative: +0
Speed: 30ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 13 (+3 studded leather armor), touch 10, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple: +1/+4
Attack: Falchion +4 melee (2d4+4/18-20) or javelin +1 ranged (1d6+3)
Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: -----
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60ft., light sensitivity
Saves: Fort +3, Ref +0, Will -2
Abilities: Str 17, Dex 11, Con 12, Int 8, Wis 7, Cha 6
Skills: Listen +1, Spot +1
Feats: Alertness
Environment: Temperate hills
Organization: Gang (2-4), squad (11-20 plus 2 3rd level sergeants and 1 leader of 3rd-6th level) or band (30-100 plus 150% noncombatants plus 1 3rd level sergeant per 10 adults, 5 5th level lieutenants, and 3 7th-level captains)
Challenge Rating: 1/2
Treasure: Standard
Alignment: Often chaotic evil
Advancement: By character class
Level Adjustment: +0

“After Thursby’s failure to handle the labor crisis in Montana, I had little choice but to grab my trusty falchion, ready my javelins, and descend into the mine shaft after the hobgoblins. Fortunately I could see in the dark, and was not caught flat-footed when the kobold’s mace glanced harmlessly off of my studded leather…”

  • Grover Cleveland, “Presidential Problems”