Nicolas Cage is a Stupid Geek

Kal-el Coppola Cage.

There’s a multitude of jokes in here somewhere but I’ve been up since 4 AM and can’t think. Somebody else make them.

I would come up with something, but stupid celebrities giving their kids silly names isn’t really news anymore. Kinda sad for the kids, really, except that they’re probably going to grow up with no financial problems whatsoever so I really can’t feel sorry for them.

I can’t think of any jokes…not that witty but yeah… wtf?

I pains me that celebrities are looked up to by so many people and the ones you think are ok, are just as moronic as all the others.

Kal-el… christ

First of all, naming your kid “Kal-El” is so over-the-top cool that I can’t even begin to describe it. Of course, I’ve been trying to convince my wife that if we ever have a son we should name him “Hawkwind”, so go figure.

Second: Considering Nick named himself after Luke Cage, this is hardly surprising.

Third: As far as stupid celebrity kid names go, this isn’t so bad. He can just shorten it to “Kal” if he wants, which sounds perfectly normal. Unlike, say, Chastity Bono.

Brad and Angelina need to name their kid Zodd.

If the surname is Pitt, I’m hoping they call it Quatermassandthe

Jeez. Why not cut out the middle man and name him Who Wants to Beat Me Up First?

They should’ve called him Johnny.

But then the kid would have to don sunglasses and punch people in the groin while doing the splits a lot.