You motherfuckers got me reading Piers’ crazy-ass blog again, and look at this abomination from Feb 2010:
(http://www.hipiers.com/10feb.html at yer own risk)
yeeeeeeeeeeeeah WAT
OH JACKSTAR NO
I’m gonna have to disagree with quatoria, and say there’s nothing in Anthonology close to the WTF threshold of Firefly. I remember three stories with scarring sexual content:
The one with the women being factory-farm milked on an alternate Earth where all the megafauna were dead. They were kept ignorant to the point that they were almost completely animalistic (and they had their tongues cut so they couldn’t speak).
The one where some dude invents a wonder material that can be used to make indestructible transparent clothes. It’s so unnoticeable you can fuck with it on (so it’s a perfect contraceptive) and not feel the difference. Then at the end the main character forgets he’s wearing it when he takes a shit.
The one with the 6-inch tall woman who’s a homunculus sent from another dimension to harvest some dude’s sperm. Her vagina is a portal to her homeworld so she can TAKE IT ALL UNF YEAH. (Note: I can’t help but think of this story when I hear the song Incredibad.
So yeah, all of those are skeevy as fuck, but I don’t think they compare to the mountains of issues in Firefly. Hell, I’m not even sure they stand up to the Mode series (featuring yet more delicious pedophilia, as well as genetically engineered furry sex slaves).
For what it’s worth, Piers Anthony is an anagram for Horny Panties.
Dissing Zelazny? How?
Anthony is disgusting but the list of lecherous perverted old fuck scifi writers is a mile long.
Recalls reading about old geezer sex in the Rama series, dry-heaves Damn you, Arthur C. Clarke!
OH MY GOD I HEARD THE MOST SCANDALOUS THING ABOUT THIS GUY BUT I CAN’T TELL YOU WHAT IT IS.
“What was it?”
NO I CAN’T TELL YOU IT’S TOO SCANDALOUS, AND NOW YOU’RE FREAKING ME OUT FOR EVEN ASKING.
What? Man, fuck that. Anthony couldn’t carry Zelazny’s jockstrap.
That ain’t sayin’ much. LOTS of writers can’t carry Zelazny’s jockstrap. But I’m still curious. Hey, maybe Zelazny was a real asshole, like Ellison.
Ugh. The old geezer ‘we must procreate’ sex thing was not the direction I was expecting Rama to take with its sequels.
Rishathra! Rishathra! Rishathra!
There’s, uh, a couple stories you’re forgetting. Specifically, ones that I’ve been tempted to make use of power drills to forget, myself. Specifically, 'On The Uses of Torture’, about as big a goddamned squick as you’re likely to find outside of Japan.
Oh fuck you. I HAD forgotten that one.
That one at least was an interesting concept and while it was utterly sadistic, I couldn’t hear Anthony fapping away in the background while I read it.
Yes, Rimbo, I’m that scared off. Deal with disappointment.
Deal with plonk.
Oh my God, what a relief.
Jackstar is my new favourite jackhole… was his previous persona just as annoying?
I was gonna say… he joined in 2003, 2,300 posts, and I’ve never heard of Jackstar before he started demonstrating his weirdness in this thread. Did I miss a Bananas and Nuts entry on this guy?
Anyway, Piers Anthony. I purchased Anthonology like 25 years ago because I used to enjoy his Xanth series (when it was only 5 or 6 books long). It was weird as hell, but not nearly as WTF as the Firefly summary Angie posted. That’s just total NAMBLA spank material. I wonder what his daughter and granddaughter think of his writings.
Source of Magic (Xanth) was one of the first Fantasy books I ever read when I was around 9 or 10. I definitely credit that series for getting me into reading and sci-fi/fantasy. I stayed with it for about 10 more books until either I got older or the series got even more ridiculous.
I have a foggy recollection of liking Bio and enjoying his Apprentice Adept Series, but I was a pre-pubescent kid and apparently so was he.
I actually had intended to introduce Xanth to my 9 year old son who devours books like I did and loves Fantasy as well. I held onto all my Xanth books with the intention of giving them to him. I knew Anthony had an adult series of books, but didn’t realize how bad it actually was. Maybe I’ll pass on the Xanth books for him.
The problem with the Xanth novels is that when you first read them you are either young enough to not pick up on the rapey, child-fucking subtexts or it’s easy to overlook because of the silly style with all the goddamn puns. But once you’ve read his other books it’s really hard to ignore how people are constantly wanting to use the love springs to negate someone’s ability to not consent, or how everyone wants to look at an 8 year old’s panties.
Also, sexpot daughter involved with Raman colony crime lord! God the last 2 books of that series sucked.