Arnold was easily the king of these – even the cringes turn into smiles. Commando really is one of the funniest movies of all times because of Arnie.
Pretty much every action star gets a few good ones though.
Another great one: Bruce Campbell in Army of Darkness/Evil Dead 2 - most of those line were stolen for use in Duke Nukem 3D, of course.
Matrix: You’re a funny man, Sully, I like you. That’s why I’m going to kill you last.
[Later]
Matrix: Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last?
Sully: That’s right, Matrix. You did.
Matrix: I lied.
If we’re talking Shane Black, then Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is where it’s at:
Perry: Look up idiot in the dictionary. You know what you’ll find?
Harry: A picture of me?
Perry: No! The definition of idiot. Which you fucking are!
Harry: [after meeting “Gay Perry”] Still gay?
Perry: No, knee-deep in pussy. I just love the name so much I can’t get rid of it.
Harmony: Well, for starters, she’s been fucked more times than she’s had a hot meal.
Harry: Yeah, I heard about that. It was neck-and-neck and then she skipped lunch.
Several years ago, Conan O’Brien had a little between-interviews comedy bit that featured this line, as part of a series of Steven Segal public service announcements imploring viewers to support their local blood bank, food bank, and Israel. If you’re confused about that last one, Steven Seagal’s line was redubbed to say, “I’ll take you to the bank, Senator Trent… The West Bank!”
My own favorite bit from Hard to Kill was when Mason Storm hunts for the Senator in his own house, calling out to him with a musical, “Vernon! Oh Verrrrnonnnn! Where are yoooouu?” This is immediately followed by Storm searching through closets and drawers. That’s right, he searched through drawers for the Senator.
As for Commando, my favorite line comes early in the movie, as one baddie is left behind to explain the dire situation to Matrix, who’s toting a big G3 rifle: “If you want your kid back, you’re gonna have to cooperate. Right?” “WRONG!”
“Consider this a divorce!” from Total Recall is also a choice quote.
-Sir, are you classified as human?
-Negative, I am a meat popsicle.
5th Element
Hmm, lets see: Rambo III
Afghan Kid: Whats that
Rambo: A blue light
Afghan Kid: What does it do
Rambo: It glows blue!
Caddyshack: “It’s in the hole! It’s in the hole! It’s in the hole”
High Fidelity (Ok not a one liner in the one liner sense of thought):
Dick: I guess it looks as if you’re reorganizing your records. What is this though? Chronological?
Rob: No…
Dick: Not alphabetical…
Rob: Nope…
Dick: What?
Rob: Autobiographical.
Dick: No fucking way.
Rumsfield in the famous movie “Iraq War”: “Reports that say that something hasn’t happened are always interesting to me, because as we know, there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns — the ones we don’t know we don’t know.”
Oh shit, thats not a movie. Should´ve been.
Little Bill: I’ll see you in hell, William Munny
Munny: Yeah.
“No more rhyming and I mean it!”
“Anybody want a peanut?”