Paramount's new studio and WTF is wrong with us?

Saw this on reddit.

Louis Feola says that, starting in 2010, the division expects to release 5 to 6 films annually with titles to encompass a mix of sequels, prequels and remakes based on the libraries of Paramount Pictures.

PFP recently wrapped principal photography on its first feature length film, Without a Paddle: Nature’s Calling, a sequel to the 2004 comedy.Saw this linked on reddit.

Pretty sad if this is their attempt to turn larger profits. I’m just not sure if it’s sad because because it’ll work or because it’s doomed to fail. Without a Paddle? Really?

So does PFP stand for “Pretty Fucking Pathetic”?

Who is the ‘us’ in the title?

Filmport Studios just opened here in Toronto, which is great news for ‘us’ :)

Us = humanity.

There’s a whole market out there for milking schlock titles with schlockier direct-to-video sequels. Cf. the sequels to Behind Enemy Lines, the sequels to Van Wilder, the sequels to Tom Berenger’s Sniper, and all those American Pie movies. Unless you’re an insomniac with lots of premium cable movie channels, I think that you can safely ignore Paramount’s new studio and it will never impinge on your existence.

They are currently planning to produce at least 4 movies based on Monopoly, Candy Land, Clue, Ouija, Battleship, Magic the Gathering or Stretch Armstrong starting in 2010.

I am completly serious.

Im hoping the Stretch Armstrong movie will be a porno.

I’d like to see CandyLand done as an urban crime drama with Al Pacino and Javier Bardem

You’re probably right. I kinda wonder if money used for these movies takes opportunities away from potentially good movies, though.

Ah. Well, maybe you should go work for Paramount, Drama Queen :p

Yes, and the money spent on making silly computer games isn’t spent on fighting world hunger…

You offering me a job?

Both those are both good things.

Is Ridley Scott still attached to Monopoly?

He was, but then he landed on Boardwalk and now he’s bankrupt.

I’m not defending the movie’s content, but IMDB says it grossed three times the estimated cost to make the film, so clearly some demographic shelled out the ten bucks to see it.

The studio banking on some fraction of those people paying to see the sequel doesn’t seem to be that great a gamble.