Random thought thread!


Or maybe I should just lay off the spicy foods and beer so close to bedtime.


Chives are just skinny scallions and we should all stop enabling their bullshit.

(I know they’re not. But a recipe called for chives and now I have like 9/10s of a bunch of chives rapidly wilting and it’s hot bullshit because I’ve always got scallions lying around)


I’m pretty sure chives are just completely made up. And you’ll never convince me that capers aren’t actually rat droppings.


You’ve hit upon the real problem, though. What if I just want, like, two scallions? The supply chain conspires against me. I cook for two people. I go through a full grocery-store-sized bundle of scallions before they go bad approximately never. It’s unfair.


So real talk, garlic chives, which are easy as hell to find at Asian grocers, are like 90% better than chives for every case except when you want tiny pieces of garlicky-oniony green stuff in your food without having to do much work, especially because they have scallion-esque lifespans.

Mind you, they still sell the fucking things by the metric ton, because, well, international groceries and all, but whatevs :)


The most obvious reading to me isn’t about Trumpmerica or whatever but (and I don’t usually do this, dreams are bullshit and random and I’m not a person who gets a book about dream readings or goes to a psychic, alright) is that you are having a problem and no one else is taking you seriously. What you described is what people who are depressed go through. “Hey, I have this gaping wound in my chest but no one is taking me seriously” is pretty much a transcription of what people who are massively depressed say about their problems. Rather than depressed it could be any number of other mental conditions, which are super real to the person experiencing them but no one else can see or help with what’s going on. Marriage in trouble? Family member dying? No one is going to say anything more than basically “I’m sorry, that sucks,” but that doesn’t help you at all. Maybe you’re just visualizing that.

/armchair psychologist

Or it’s just some random synapses firing and your brain is trying to make sense of them. Visual of gaping wound in chest triggered your adrenaline response which has effects on your memory so you remembered it this time.


The thing is, I can’t think of any real problems that make me think, of course! My brain is trying to resolve this. I’m almost embarrrassed to say things are going really well with my life at the moment. I’ve got the standard hitches and speed bumps like everybody but nothing serious.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that the imagery and intensity of feeling within the dream, the helplessness, seemed very out of balance with anything going on in my life. I guess that dichotomy is adding to the oddness of the feeling. But maybe you have the right of it, sometimes a messed up dream is just a messed up dream.


Actually, yeah:

After doing years of bemoaning and bitching about my situation, I’ll take this thread to say that life has gone pretty well the last year or so, all things considered. Gf got a great job with amazing medical care, and while all her issues aren’t over with by a long shot, she’s on a path to health. Her income suddenly going from $0 to 10% more than what I make turned a dire financial situation into one where we’re just shoving money onto debts and into savings because we don’t know what to do with it. . . (and for reference, we’re still a long ways off from even breaking 6 digits pre-tax combined, but honestly, we live pretty fucking frugal). I’ve made some amazing friends in my local area, cook food I love, play games I love, and somehow still have a job.

So, like. . . yay. I don’t mean to rub that in anyone’s face that isn’t having a good time right now, but I think I spent so much time crying my soul out to you guys when things were at their worst that karma demands I at least express some portion of the extreme gratefulness I feel for my current situation.


Garlic chives just don’t seem to come in small quantities. I’ve purchased a bundle at the local chinese grocery specifically to make a big batch of chive dumplings and I still wind up with half the bundle left over.


If you say so.

Just sautee them with some scrambled eggs for a protein, or bean sprouts for a veggie dish.


That’s nice to hear. Always good to see someone suddenly happy with the way things are. :)


So the wife showed me a video of a ghost. It was really shitty video of someone wearing white or bright clothing running by a really crappy secutity camera.

I explained to her that I would be glad to go to any allegedly haunted house in the world and spend the night. Just a few rules.

  1. I bring my own food and water.
  2. I am the only one in the house.
  3. I get to bring my guns and ammo with me.

Why number three? Because I want to make number two very clear. If I am the only one in the house I won’t be bothered by someone left strategically behind to cause issues. Would you ‘haunt’ a house if you had the chance of being shot? The ghosts wouldn’t care. Only the live folks that are trying to fuck with me.


I don’t see how that ends well. Seems like one of two possible outcomes: ghost isn’t real, in which case you perforate a prankster, or ghost is real and guns probably aren’t going to help much.


The prankster won’t take the chance. At least I would hope. The second part is not going to happen. There are no ghosts. Only pranksters.

Edit: To clarify. If I’m going to be alone in a haunted house, fine. Let me be alone. I’ll have recording equipment. I’ll film the whole thing. But you have to be sure that I’m alone. I’ll make sure of that. I have a gun or guns. No ghost will be hurt. If some idiot wants to fuck with me, so be it.

I’ll prove that there is no ghost. Anywhere.


I mean, James Randi will give you a million bucks if you can prove the ghost is real!*

*No one has ever claimed the money.


In the surprise twist ending, you shoot at a real ghost and get killed by a ricochet. Then Red Serling steps out and makes a witty one-liner about it.


Shotguns are loaded with salt, of course.


So you’re saying salt works on ghosts? I never knew that!


Salt shotguns are a reference to the TV show supernatural. There are those old myths about salt perimeters keeping spirits away but I’m not sure what culture it is from - probably British.


Keeps brides away too.