Ridiculous workplace rules

http://tinyurl.com/bu6ht

Found this article on yahoo, thought the last bit was pretty… uh, well I wouldn’t want to work there:

A librarian lost her job for devoting too much time to saving a squirrel stuck in a ceiling.

Hurry up and get that squirrel out outta the ceiling bitch, or you’re fired! Got any other stories to add?

Don’t you hate pants?

If you’re interested, here is the whole list.

Oh man, some weird stuff there. I do understand and agree with the no spanish rule though. Anything said on company property by employees can, does, and will effect business. If my employees were speaking another language, I could not monitor what they were saying, and they could be saying deeply offensive or racist things to customers or others in the workplace.

While on company property, even if you are on your break, you have to play by company rules.

Petty workplace rules indicate a business where the powers that be don’t trust their employees, don’t have the skill to manage them, or don’t have the balls to replace them.

Also, bear in mind that all of those horror stories don’t appear in the press out of no-where. Firing someone for praying, trying to remove vermin from a workplace, speaking Spanish, or for meeting friends outside of work, are all slam-dunk invitations to get sued. It’s stunning how many employers sincerely believe that “you have to play by company rules” is somehow reflected in the law. It isn’t. Even if you’re an at-will worker, you’d be surprised how difficult it can be for your employer to get rid of you, at least without making your position redundant.

A common example is small companies trying to tell their employees what to do outside of work. When I would go through the civil suits list as a crime reporter, there would always be a handful of lawsuits noodling on this issue (or the ‘no speekie inglais’ one), right up there with the standard selection of police brutality and parents-suing-the-school-district lawsuits. In fact, employees suing their employers was by far and away No. 1, when you discount people suing the government.

What we imagine to be choking up the system – suing for gazillions after being burned by hot coffee, slipping on grease in a supermarket, or being allowed to drink yourself into hospital by a barman – standard tort of negligence shit – were pretty rare.

Pretty workplace rules are great – they let you figure out a job sucks without having to actually work there.

The flip side is that you have to wonder what these lists are leaving out. The squirrel incident, for example, is something I could see firing someone over if looked at through a different lens.

A squirrel stuck in a ceiling isn’t exactly a tame little creature and could quickly become a safety threat for that employee in terms of bites or scratches Someone who’s putting themselves and others at risk, while wasting several hours of company time instead of calling for the animal protection services or whomever is responsible for such in your town, isn’t exactly an example of an employee who’s thinking things through.