6157

Fat, nazi wannabe badasses are true chick magnets.

6158

I have seen this several times recently. Usually I just pull out my lasso and try to hogtie the dude. But often I fail the buttons in time so he runs off and starts shooting at me, and I have to pull out my sidearm and take him down. I guess I should finish this RDR at some point.

6159

What’s the point of posing with a gun like that? Oh yeah, it’s like posing with your dick in your hand. Some of us have a bit more confidence than that.

6160

Well in my case the guy was drunk and the police were close, and it was real life

6161

(back to the previous '90s hip-hop joke because all you old white men are FAILING ME)

Slide, slide, slippity slide /
Peein’ on honey skirts since like eighty-fi-ive /

EDIT: SORRY YOU SUCK KERZAIN

6162

The closest I got to hip hop in the 90s was Rage Against the Machine.

Oh, and some Weird Al song.

6163

“Amish Paradise” made quite an impression on the young Miguk as well.

6164

Regulators… mount up!

6165

Fucking gold. You win Qt3 today.

6166

Bitching about tweetstorms is the new “I just hate talking to a machine”.

6167

I still hate talking to a machine.

6168

Ha ha. The worst is having to listen to the machine list all your options before it will respond to your request for, “agent…agent…AGENT!!!”

6169

No, the worst is “Before I connect you with an agent, why don’t we see if I can help you solve your problem.”

It’s pure failure, followed by failure to admit failure. And the only sensible response is "Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn!”

6170

If you swear at one of those automated machines, it’ll usually get you to a real human being faster.

6171

Pressing 0 every couple of seconds regardless of the verbal prompt can also be effective for some systems if you’d prefer to be subtle.

6172
6174
6175

But all of that — by definition — would be lost on people who place Trump over their messiah. Try having a conversation about any policy topic — Russia, climate change, trade, immigration — and you’ll soon realize it’s futile.

Likewise, when aides, activists and staffers openly declare that a partisan vote is more important than a victim (or in the case of Roy Moore, lots of alleged victims), what’s the point of listening to them or giving them a platform? They’ve told you that truth, decency, facts and everything else take second place to the preservation of the cult/party/president. That’s Kellyanne Conway’s modus operandi now.
[…]
At some point, some segment of Trump’s voters became so intellectually or morally corrupt as to become cultist. Hillary Clinton called them “deplorables” — and then took a beating for casting millions of Americans as racist. It’s time, I would suggest, to accept an unpleasant reality — there are some Americans who are not operating in good faith and are unreachable by logic or appeals to decency. How many of President Trump’s supporters fall into that category? We don’t know. But one comes to the conclusion that a good deal of the jaw-dropping spin that comes from Trump, his press secretary, his aides and the Fox News sycophants is designed to give this group of cultists something — anything to say — when confronted with reality. It need not be true, rational, decent or consistent. It’s filler for them to use, akin to putting their fingers in their ears and humming, when confronted by reality-based Americans or real news. We shouldn’t be surprised that Trump’s base has not abandoned him; people who look to him rather than their religious messiah are not going to change their minds based on real-world events.

6176

If I was a religious person I’d say that Trump is the closest thing to the Anti-Christ that we’ll ever get.

6177

From 2016