421

I’d disagree with that one. Alternate timelines are a pretty mainstream idea in physics. Overarching galactic destinies are just plot devices, and ones that require a lot of care.

This case was just several times worse than it should have been. First of all, Kirk is chased by some thing which gets randomly eaten by another thing at just the right moment. Then Kirk falls down a massive ice cliff and is apparently completely unhurt. THEN he finds a convenient cave just as the new chaser almost reaches him. THEN some random Vulcan shows up to save him. THEN… that same random Vulcan turns out to be Spock of all people. THEN… they walk to some random, middle-of-nowhere space station and just happen to meet Scotty. Then … it just happens to turn out that Scotty is the only person in the world could possibly warp them back to the Enterprise.

That’s just terrible writing. There’s no way around it. Not one, but a vast cornucopia of bad plot elements randomly working out exactly how the main characters need them to.

The thing with an overarching galactic destiny is, if it’s that specific and powerful, why even bother? Why can’t it just have a mechanical failure in the mining ship cause the ship to explode? And who cares about the plot given that we know crazy, arbitrary things will happen at the drop of a hat to make sure everything works out?

422

Because it would violate the first rule of the galactic narrative. That it has to be entertaining!

423

Just finished watching the Balance of Terror on Netflix.

The Romulan Commander: “In a different reality, I could have called you friend.”

How cool would it be if the next movie, maybe involving a goodwill mission to save future-doomed Romulus, actually let this come to pass?

424

cannon: a mounted gun for firing heavy projectiles; a gun, howitzer, or mortar

canon: a basis for judgment, a standard or criterion; a group of literary works that are generally accepted as representing a field; the works of a writer that have been accepted as authentic

425

'Member the episode when Kirk improvised a cannon to kill that lizard dude?

426

Only if Ben Cross plays the Romulan commander.

427

So… you’re saying that what we really have here is a canon cannon?

428

Fantastic movie.

To add to the pile of nits, it kind of bugged me that the final calamity of the movie (almost getting sucked into the black hole) was really of their own making, since they could have been backing away from it as soon as it opened up…they probably didn’t need to sit motionless while they taunted Nero.

That would have made a great end-of-credits scene.

429

Saw it again over the weekend and here’s a couple things I noticed this time around:

  1. I think some of the confusion over Klingons/Romulans in the Kobayashi Maru may be due to the fact that this movie used the term “Klingon Warbird” when describing the hostile ships. To get super nerdy and nitpicky, Romulan Warbird is the name of a kind of ship, and Klingon Bird of Prey is a kind of ship, but a Klingon Warbird isn’t anything. Not to mention, those were Klingon Battle Cruisers rather than Birds of Prey.

  2. I got the impression this time around that Uhura first made her move on Spock there in the turbolift. There was obviously some tension before that point, but if that was the beginning of their actual involvement (rather than when they had a direct student-teacher relationship) it makes the whole thing seem slightly less inappropriate.

430

Good god what a brain-dead incoherent sloppily-written shaky-cam mess of a movie.

No wonder it’s making so much money. JJ has finally managed to create a Trek film that’s stupid enough to be popular.

431

Enh, whatever. You know, maybe it’s popular because it’s funny, it has solid action and special effects, it pays a lot of homages to the source material, and the cast aren’t senior citizens.

432

433

Remember that Spock originally assigned Uhura to a different ship than the Enterprise and, when questioned by Uhura as to the reason, he mentioned avoiding any hint of favoritism or impropriety. This implies that they may have been together already.

434

435

Not only was there the mention of avoiding an appearance of impropriety while they were still on Earth, but I can’t believe you missed the comment about her showing “exceptional aural* sensitivity.”

  • methinks she had the homophone in mind.
436

Not true. There was actually technology exchanged between the Klingons and the Romulans.

437

I saw this more of a “Everybody in the class knows Uhura wants to bone the professor” than that they’d actually been together.

438

The only shaky cams that really annoyed me were the chat between Kirk and Captain whatshisface in the bar (some directors fear a static camera with their talking heads I guess) and the stupid quick cuts from the fight on the drill.

439

The gimmicky camera work pissed me off the most in the battle sequences. They blew millions of dollars on all this state-of-the-art CGI, but then ruined it with the incessant shaking and zooming and lens flaring, often to the point where I could only barely tell what the hell was going on. So it’s not even decent spaceship porn.

Oh yeah, and now we have handheld phasers with chunky moving parts that go “click”. Did they just skip a step and have Mattel manufacture those things?

440

Did we already talk about the phaser beams going away? I may have even posted about it, these threads start to run together.