Star Wars VIII: Spoiler Time

This is a fun thread, if it didn’t exist I’d probably assume that the general reception to the movie was pretty positive. Or maybe it was, and this is just another installment of cranky old men theater. Still, I would not have believed people still have the capacity to get angry about Star Wars after the prequels.

My kids hate these movies too. They didn’t even finish Rogue One, and they fell asleep in Last Jedi. Grandpa Luke Skywalker was an exciting concept going in but he fell flat.

They watch the originals and the prequels beginning to end no problem.

Everyone shits on RotJ but that throne room scene was fucking excellent and a perfect climax to Luke’s saga.

The Rogue One hate is so… odd to me. Like I get the Abrams hate, and fall there myself, but liked TFA. TLJ has issues, but also things I liked. I’d say it is the worst non prequel movie.

But Rogue One? That was pure Star Wars.

Grimdark characters and everyone dying at the end is pure Star Wars? Maybe American McGee’s Star Wars.

Also shoehorning the ending into the beginning of the real Star Wars movies with cartoon Leia is cringe worthy.

My Rogue One challenge to people is to ask them to name a single character, besides Jyn Erso because they repeat her name 55 times in the movie. The characters are forgettable and shitty and they all die anyway.

Moff Tarkin!
Darth Vader!

Seriously though, I don’t understand this challenge. Name a character other than Jake in Chinatown. Name a character other than Colonel Kurtz in Apocalypse Now. There’s scores of character names I don’t remember from a bunch of great movies. What does that prove?

Cassian Andor
Chirrut Imwe
Baze Malbus
Saw Gerrera
Bodhi Rook
Director Krennic
K-2SO
Galen Erso
Admiral Raddus

Yes it was darker in tone, and the main characters died in the end, but it had a hopeful end.

Wow, those names look crazy out of context, i.e. not having seen the movie. Makes me nostalgic for the days when characters had good, strong names. You know, like Walrus Man!

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Oh you mean Ponda Baba?

Edit: yes, that is the real name. Yes I did know that off the top of my head. I’m sure that says something about me.

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Of the three new Star Wars movies I think Rogue One probably is the best, I think if it had come out and was not called a Star Wars movie it would have done well.

TFA was good for what it was, a re-introduction to the old characters and the start of the new. TLJ was just disappointing on so many levels.

Challenge is to do it without google.

No one cares about Walrus man. But we all knew who Darth Vader was after the first viewing of Star Wars. We knew Han, Chewie, Leia, Obi Wan, Luke. They were memorable characters. I came out of Rogue One not knowing anything except Blind Guy and Sarcastic Droid. The other characters were rubbish.

I did do it without google. All of that, off the top of my head.

Rogue One was better than VII and VIII.

Seriously, in TLJ why did we have the scene with Luke milking the ocean cow (wtf), and almost zero reference to Han’s death…

You won! Here’s your no-prize.

You shut your mouth! Walrus Man was all, “Blarg blarg blarg” and got all in Luke’s face. He gave us a chance to see Obi Wan go all badass. He was pivotal to the drama of that movie.

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Plus Walrus Guy and Mr. You’ll-Be-Dead have a cameo in Rogue One!

All right why didn’t any of you jokers tell me that up front. Now I finally have a reason to see Rogue One.

I knew that name because of robot chicken: