My live-in girlfriend of two years was just folding her laundry and found a female shirt and a pair of shorts that were on top of my dryer. This led to a very interesting conversation, and I’m sure many of you can imagine the drilling I just got from her. We’ve had only one person over in the last two weeks, one of her female coworkers. Neither of us are sure why she would have had spare clothes, nor why she would have left them on the dryer, though it is in a spare bathroom.
Beyond that, I’m at a loss. I’m still getting the evil eye right now as though my, “I have no idea,” story isn’t flying.
We just got back from a short vacation too. I’m doing a mental rolodex in my head right now of past girlfriends and wondering if any of them had a spare house key. God forbid one of them came into the house while we were away.
I’m having fun imagining a BBC’s Sherlock-style investigation into this conundrum, complete with hazy flashbacks and Burnatick Crumplesatch emoting derision at the camera. . .
This wasn’t a recent conversation (it’s from December), but it amused me enough to screencap and tweet it back then:
I think I’m going to be okay. Though she hasn’t confirmed, she thinks the shirt looks like something her coworker wore and probably pulled out of her pocketbook while rearranging it while here. Who knows why a spare shirt and shorts. Gym clothes maybe.
My girlfriend refuses to, “bother her with that right now,” I think so she can milk out me sweating about it for a little longer.
Just want to say this, jealousy is an ugly dragon, make sure her problem with you is just that and not other stuff too…
Also toilet paper, it accounts for less than 0.01 % of our household expenses, yet fuck me the trouble I get for using too much…and it’s even the renewable sort.
Yet I’m pretty sure that pair of new jeans was needed, oh yeah…
When my wife and I first got married, we had a long, very serious, conversation about the direction of the toilet paper roll. She took the position that the loose end should unroll from the bottom. I believe it should unroll over the top. This has proven to be a deep divide between us, as 24 years later we still disagree.
Our cats, however, take my side and strongly prefer the over-the-top method. Whilst entertaining, that has significantly increased our toilet paper expenses over the years.
I once had a conversation with my dissertation director about the exact same issue: she and I agreed that the only proper approach was over the top, but also that it was clearly a binary divide across the population who use toilet paper.
We also agreed that there was coming an existential conflict between Islam and Western Civilization ™. Oh, and that Mongolian Chicken is better than Mongolian Beef.
Oh man, significant others and religion, now there’s a topic. It’s always coming up in my household, especially now that we have kids. And usually it’s me that ends up giving way since I consider myself agnostic, and therefore having no real strong feelings about religion, versus my wife’s Catholicism and associated strong feelings.
Not that it’s really a source of conflict mind you, and definitely not the minefield that combination likely puts into your brain. Yes, I did make a commitment to the Catholic Church to raise my kids in their tradition. I also told them I would raise my kids to think for themselves and draw their own conclusion. The priest and I considered this arrangement fair.
So it means I end up going to mass on a fairly regular, though not really all that frequent, basis. Christmas, Easter, that sort of thing. And I don’t mind too much, everyone there is really nice. We did the whole baptism thing. My son points out whenever we drive past, look Dad, our church. And I sigh and say, yeah I guess it is.
