That Internet dating thing

WarrenM · 2010-01-20T10:18:39.000Z

Saw this today, seemed relevant:

The OkCupid Blog

Reflections on dating culture, told through data, stories and humor.

Shadarr · 2010-01-20T10:36:44.000Z

In terms of getting new messages, the MySpace Shot is the single most effective photo type for women.

Well hell, I guess that’s why it’s so popular.

Mark_Asher · 2010-01-20T17:46:19.000Z

Shadarr:

Be sure to give her some good material then!

Ha ha. Yes, Teledyne, go crazy and give her grist for a column.

teledyne · 2010-01-20T21:08:41.000Z

Just got back from the first date… it went remarkably well! I was a few minutes late (it was raining, mind you) but we got in right in time for the reservation I had made. We were seated in the back away from the noisy crowd, which was really nice and thoughtful of the waitstaff. We had some beer and tapas, and we split the bill! How [awesome and] progressive!

We actually talked more about her line of work and how she decided to become a sex columnist. She mentioned that her weekly columns talk about sex in general, not specific encounters/events from the week before, and that she feels it’s pretty unethical to do otherwise.

At the end of the date, we hugged and that’s when I decided to activate the First Date Smoochin’ technique, but she beat me to it! Sweet! I think it’s sufficient to say a second date will be in order. We’re both pretty poor so I think I’ll ask if she’d like me to make dinner for her sometime. I make a killer vegetarian lasagna!

Omniscia · 2010-01-20T21:14:28.000Z

Wow, that sounds like a resounding success, man. Good on ya!

jerri_blank · 2010-01-20T21:29:16.000Z

Did you tell her we all thought you were going out with Violet Blue and were going to be “cored” eventually?

pg1 · 2010-01-20T21:40:53.000Z

WarrenM:

Saw this today, seemed relevant:

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/2010/01/20/the-4-big-myths-of-profile-pictures/

Really interesting but seems confusing as well. For the most part they are just looking at numbers not actual results or quality, etc.

BTW, I would do the kickball thing but the closest is near downtown which would be a huge PITA, as I live in the suburbs. I also spent a few hours a while back browsing www.meetup.com but it seemed everything single group I found interesting was made up of people 40+. Bummer.

Papageno · 2010-01-20T21:43:10.000Z

You lucky young bastard. I remember dates like that. Unless a miracle occcurs, I doubt I’ll ever have another.

ElGuapo · 2010-01-20T22:38:55.000Z

Got two girl’s phone numbers tonight at the bar after broomball. Both of them were there to meet people. HIGHLY RECOMMEND KICKBALL and/or other activities like it.

Also, giving OKCupid another chance. There is a girl on it that lives a few blocks from me, so we’ll see how that goes.

teledyne · 2010-01-20T22:48:29.000Z

WarrenM:

Saw this today, seemed relevant:

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/2010/01/20/the-4-big-myths-of-profile-pictures/

Shit! Most of my photos are of me holding a beer!

News update! I just received a text from my date apologizing for not paying her full half of the ticket (she was $10 shy), and would like to make it up to me next time! Woo hoo!

I actually did mention Violet Blue and Regina Lynn to segue into that topic. She asked me what you guys meant, so I explained that Violet Blue is like a catch-and-release fisherman–but before she releases you back, she rips out your heart and writes a weekly column about it for the whole world to read about.

JoshV · 2010-01-20T23:10:48.000Z

WarrenM:

Saw this today, seemed relevant:

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/2010/01/20/the-4-big-myths-of-profile-pictures/

I have to admit, even though I no longer need or use online dating services, I found this article fascinating.

Dean · 2010-01-21T08:39:53.000Z

teledyne:

Shit! Most of my photos are of me holding a beer!

We can’t see this unless we have an OKCupid account. Just FYI.

Mightynute · 2010-01-21T08:48:39.000Z

Dean:

We can’t see this unless we have an OKCupid account. Just FYI.

I will attest to the fact that teledyne is, in fact, holding a beer in most of his photos. WYSIWYG marketing is alive and well on OKCupid.

I as well have fallen to peer pressure and actually set up a profile and sent out a few feelers to some of the local potentially-interesting gals. OKCupid really seems to think I match well with the bespectacled indie-rocker chick type. I am not questioning this assessment, but it really makes me wonder what their compatibility matrix is.

nixon66 · 2010-01-21T09:22:50.000Z

Mightynute:

I will attest to the fact that teledyne is, in fact, holding a beer in most of his photos. WYSIWYG marketing is alive and well on OKCupid.

I as well have fallen to peer pressure and actually set up a profile and sent out a few feelers to some of the local potentially-interesting gals. OKCupid really seems to think I match well with the bespectacled indie-rocker chick type. I am not questioning this assessment, but it really makes me wonder what their compatibility matrix is.

I just made a tentative stab at one last night as well. The initial matches are… odd, but I suppose I’ll be able to refine them. I’m just not super comfortable trying to make myself seem interesting and witty with my profile, but I suppose I’ll get over that.

Question though. How does one talk about their child? I’ve got a four year old son. He’s with me 2/3rds of the time and the single most important thing in my life, but how best to balance his key role in who I am with the rest of this stuff?

Mightynute · 2010-01-21T09:24:48.000Z

nixon66:

Question though. How does one talk about their child? I’ve got a four year old son. He’s with me 2/3rds of the time and the single most important thing in my life, but how best to balance his key role in who I am with the rest of this stuff?

I have no idea there. After the first wave of matches all came up as single mothers, I immediately set up a “Children = no” filter and was much more pleased with the results.

shift6 · 2010-01-21T09:43:33.000Z

Mightynute:

I will attest to the fact that teledyne is, in fact, holding a beer in most of his photos. WYSIWYG marketing is alive and well on OKCupid.

He was also holding a beer every second of the time we hung out in San Fran. I think it’s a fair assessment of him. ;)

nixon66 · 2010-01-21T10:02:05.000Z

Mightynute:

I have no idea there. After the first wave of matches all came up as single mothers, I immediately set up a “Children = no” filter and was much more pleased with the results.

I hear you. I’m not adverse to dating other single parents, but I don’t want to scare off the entire other population of women without kids either.

Mightynute · 2010-01-21T10:08:29.000Z

Just phrase it the same way you did here. You’ve got a son about two-thirds of the time and he’s the most important thing in your life. That way, honesty out on the table and any prospective dates know what they’re in for in that regard.

Zylon · 2010-01-21T10:12:42.000Z

teledyne:

At the end of the date, we hugged and that’s when I decided to activate the First Date Smoochin’ technique, but she beat me to it!

You… transformed into a girl? Eh?

Shadarr · 2010-01-21T11:22:27.000Z

nixon66:

Question though. How does one talk about their child? I’ve got a four year old son. He’s with me 2/3rds of the time and the single most important thing in my life, but how best to balance his key role in who I am with the rest of this stuff?

Honestly, I wouldn’t mention it aside from in the appropriate Details category. Anything you say is going to make it sound like your son is part of the deal, or that you don’t really have time for a relationship. Anyone who really cares is going to filter their search, and anyone else it shouldn’t be an issue till you’ve been out a few times.