Arise!
After several weeks of conspicuous non-dating, it is not surprising that I have nothing of significance to report. Nietzsche Astrologist Guy has messaged me a few times, expressing a keen desire to get together again, which is not mutual. Same Name as NHL Coach Guy apparently had his e-mail account hijacked by a spambot, as I’ve received spam messages from him recently. I wonder if all the people cc’d are also former dates.
The last Let’s Just Be Friends Guy seems to have decided he didn’t want to be friends, either, as he did not return my last two calls. In retrospect it looks like he was going through one of those “finding myself” phases (he had mentioned as much in reference to himself as dating material at one point) so it’s probably for the best that he continue his vision quest/decent into lunacy on his own.
For myself, while not dating certainly cleared the ol’ mental attic out, I haven’t found myself more productive or magically transformed in the meantime and I do miss the social interaction, even if some of it was of the “need an excuse to leave ASAP” variety. In short, it is time to begin anew.
To do this I am re-evaluating the various sites I’ve used in the past and considering new ones. There are a lot of options but not a lot of good options. I have found it best to focus on one or two sites at the most, work them for awhile, then move on to others. You see some of the same faces on each but since each site tends to have its own flavor, the overlap is minimal.
My first decision upon re-entry into the world of dating is to rewrite my profile and assume a new handle. This is not to fool people into thinking I’m not the same person, more that I have learned from my experiences and feel I can now present myself better. The first thing is the name.
I actively detest the name I chose on OKC, which is unfortunate, because to get to 100% on OKC requires a bit of OCD and I am loathe to answer a hojillion questions again. But we do what we must.
I looked over the first 20 names that Plenty of Fish submitted to me as potential match-ups to see if there were any trends to be spotted (PoF continues to send me matches even though my profile is disabled there). The names are as follows:
Danielsan74
shawn72
Jonrrr
noexpiredate
coastaleclipse
stormy65
** Islander **
jedric
mtn-bike
JHammond3
arttony
gw1966
Yobrevol
denis011
kagan (not the Supreme Court nominee)
BlueSoul33
stilllooking71
Swimmer042
Scottie310
goodpuppy2
A list of 20 is hardly exhaustive or necessarily representative but as a thumbnail, it might provide some insights.
It appears that some people are using their real name or at least what looks like a real name, typically coupling it with the year of their birth. This could prove a bit awkward (or fortuitous, depending) for someone born in 1969. The name/number format seems quite common, with the number just as often representing age or some other random thing.
A few have ascribed a trait or characteristic to themselves in their handles – goodpuppy2 (doesn’t pee on the floor?), arttony (presumably likes art) or identify themselves by something benign, like where they came from (** Islander **) or even an open lamentation of their success rate (stilllooking71).
When I think of the profiles I’ve responded to, I realize the name has not been important to me except when it was horribly, irredeemably awful. Those ones usually involve body parts or certain physical activities indulged in an intimate setting. Sorry, HornyKneeSwoggler, you’re not for me! So it occurs to me I may be overthinking this and I could just go with the usual name/year format and be done with it.
I submit myself to the dating hivemind for this. What type of name do you use for your profile?
