Jesus Christ is PoF’s interface absolutely terrible. Just … completely… utterly… terrible. There are no redeeming factors. It makes my eyes want to bleed out all over my keyboard. How can you guys stand using it for more than about the 30 seconds required to find the Search button, then realize that you’d rather stay single than stab yourself in the face with the rusty fork that is that piece of shit website?
The main reason I use PoF is it gives me many pages of potential matches. OKC gives me about two, most of whom I’m either not interested in or have already contacted/been contacted by.
Believe it or not, PoF has actually improved its interface. It used to be even worse.
Fortunately there’s a few decent gay-specific sites I also go to, though there’s a lot more sex buddy/animated banana types on those.
Does no one talk on the phone anymore? Meet in person or meet on the Internet, all anyone wants to do is text. Truly technology changes human interaction.
I’ve found people will often give a phone number but it’s more for “if you can’t meet when we’d agreed you can text me (or vice-versa)”. Even if I go out with someone a couple of times there still seems a reluctance to actually use the phone after numbers are exchanged. It’s not a generational thing, either. It’s a bit weird.
I think people like the security of one-way or indirect communication. Less pressure and all that.
I hate talking on phones. That’s about the extent of my preference for texts. I have a feeling I’m not alone in the world.
I could start an entire thread and spend pages ranting about the recent proliferation of texting over voice communication. It pisses me off to no end. The only time I can’t stand talking on the phone is when the other person is distracted or I can’t hear or understand them, that’s even worse.
I’m old school.
I don’t like the phone. I have problems with the actual act of talking to actual human beings, and the phone lives in the weird, uncanny valley between my in-person awkwardness and my internet personality, which could probably be generously described as “Loudmouthed Asshole Who’s Only Very Occasionally Funny.” I also never feel like I’m doing enough when I’m on the phone. I have to be doing something with my hands and eyes and not just my ears and mouth.
JM1
4628
Please provide examples of the funny.
I get oddly nervous phoning people for pretty much anything, though working support for a few years fixed it in a professional context.
We can have a thread on this if you want. I’d be happy to take the other side of this debate. I think texting is just about the best thing since sliced bread. I know it’s to some degree a matter of personal communication style and everyone will have their own preferences, but I happen to love texting.
The impersonality of it removes all the need to focus full attention on the other person and attend to all the little niceties of direct interaction. When I just want to exchange a small amount of information with someone it’s much faster than calling and doesn’t disrupt whatever else I’m doing. It’s certainly not right for everything. I’d be leery of setting up a date with someone I’d never ever spoken to, for example. In general though texting is a great thing.
My observation on texting vs. phoning in a dating context:
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Women love to gripe about how men never call, they only text.
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I, and most other guys I know, have much better success texting a girl a few days after getting her number than we do calling a few days later.
I take this as further proof that what women say they want and what they actually respond to are two very different things.
Shadarr
4632
Not much interesting in there, really. People lie about height and money, because those things are important in dating. I’d be interested to find out whether lying about your height actually works in any measurable way (because, she’s going to be able to tell right at the start of the first date that you aren’t a six footer), but obviously that’s not something you can gleen from web stats.
I am a little surprised that only 12% of their female userbase is bi, it sure seemed like a lot more than that to me.
It tells me that as a 6’4" man with a decent salary I need to start dating.
Yeah, I feel weird for being honest on that. Even to the point of twice being told “I like taller men”, oh well.
Really, what’s the point of lying on a profile? If you meet someone in person, aren’t they going to find out that you’re only 5’8" instead of the 6’3" you listed on your profile?
Maybe they think their scintillating personalities will make up for their massive faults?
OKC says people exaggerate height by about two inches on average. I’m guessing a fair number of people may not notice the difference.
After a chat with someone I decided to break out the tape measure and see how tall I really was. I had always remembered myself being just a bit under 5’ 11". Turns out I misremembered and I’m actually an inch shorter, just under 5’ 10". This puts me further away from the mythic and manly 6’. I’ll have to start wearing platform shoes, I guess.
People exaggerating their income are dooming themselves if they go way over the top. If you say you make $100K per year and take your date to a slightly dingy one bedroom apartment that would be nice if it was remodeled and it’s obvious that hasn’t been done in 40 years, you’ve pretty much admitted you’re a big fat liar and it’s over. OTOH, if you’re honest and say you make under $25K how many people will pass you by because you’re obviously a loser who will never amount to anything? It’s easy to see why so many lie or exaggerate.
This one is funny, though, because I’ve seen it a lot. A guy will have a series of photos where he looks a bit heavy, has thinner hair and he’s cleanshaven. Then his main pic is one where he is toned, wearing a luxuriant dark beard and wearing something you’re pretty sure was a popular fashion around 1989. Hint: you are fooling no one. Wel, not me, anyway. Maybe they are hedging their bets against the invention of time travel.
Easy rule of thumb - if the photo background contains lasers, it may not be current.
Andrew
4638
It helps if people are automatically filtering out people below a certain height. At least if you lie you had a chance to wow them in person, where if you don’t, you’ll just silently disappear. Not that I’d do such a thing, but I can understand the motivation.
ElGuapo
4639
Also, scanned and/or clearly photoshopped photos are a BIG giveaway.
So what do people think of my profile pictures?
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Geekykat/pictures#0
I’m curious. I’ve had a couple people tell me that I should make the second picture my main one, but I disagree…
