5941

I’m sure you two will be very happy together.

5942

Update: fire, I had one of my friends on campus trim about three inches off Aaron’s hair. No more split ends, and it looks far more respectable now. :) Next step: introducing him to the wonders of conditioner. Or at least 2-in-1 shampoo.

5943

I’m going to regret this, but here’s a few pics of me nerding it up from E3 06. I’ve both lost weight and hope since then, but otherwise look surprisingly similar. Really should get a better, current picture at some point, though. I just hate being in them, I’m usually behind the camera, not in front of it. Fire, do your thing!

Age of Conan Booth. You know, I just noticed how weird the light is in this picture and makes it look like I’ve pissed myself.

Guitar Hero 2 Booth!

5944

Now, of this we need photos.

5945

Picture 1:
This is a nice headshot. Really. You are clean and well-groomed, I can clearly see your eyes and your smile, and the faint bit of the hatred of life in the corner of your eye because you are probably at work. In your cubicle. Although this photo shows very well what a good-looking chap you are, it shows very little of what kind of guy you are. It lacks personality. Maybe that’s a good thing. Women like a clean slate. “I can mold him into whatever kind of guy I like,” they say, mentally trying on different outfits on you, like a Ken doll. “He’d look great going to my friend Amy’s wedding,” they picture. “Or in a Speedo in the Bahamas spreading coconut oil on my shoulders.” Anyway, a photo lacking personality can be a blessing.

Picture 2:
Eek, the dreaded ex-girlfriend arm. We ask: How old is this photo? You haven’t answered, and yet you’ve already lost. If it’s too recent, you’re a creepy player with several women at once, or you’re on the rebound — both bad. If it’s too old, you’re a creepy serial monogamist or it’s been so long that you’ve forgotten how to please a woman in bed — both bad. Why are you ashamed of Mystery Woman? Why crop her out? Was she so hot that no other woman could compare (because any woman will try to compare herself to your exes)? Aside from Mystery Woman, you look like you’re having a seriously good time at some semi-formal event in …erm… an airplane lavatory? I dunno, something with cabinets. It’s nice to see guys having a good time. This is the face that your Potential Girlfriend will look for on her first date, and if she doesn’t see it, that’s a bad sign. Right?

What kind of guy are you? Malleable, and good-natured.

5946

For a second, I thought this picture was named “Marry Me” rather than “Harry-Me.” I like this picture for its intimacy. “This is my cat, and I like cats.” I can’t think of much to criticize about this picture. I think it’s intimate, funny, candid, and has personality.

5947

Thanks, fire.

That’s actually my daughter’s arm - and I’m taking her to the father/daughter formal.

I love the picture, but don’t want my kids posted up on a dating site.

As for the rest of the analysis, fairly spot on - that is a picture from work, cropped down significantly.

And yes, I tend to think it’s a good thing to present a fairly blank slate. Don’t give them a reason to dismiss you.

Thanks, again!

5948

Car doors, not cabinets, I believe.

5949

Ah screw it, guess I should reactivate my account and post the pictures I have up there. I’ve actually got three up there. One headshot I use for the thumbnail, which seems at least to get my profile a lot of visits, and a couple shots I grabbed from my hard drive when I made the account.

How could I not use this one?

5950

Correct, picture of me and my daughter in the driveway.

95% of the time I am getting my picture taken it is with my kids.

5951

So uh…is she hot? Just sayin’, you’re on a dating site, I’m on a dating site…you know what it’s like, man!

Oh, and 18 or over?

5952

Aaawww, yay! Thanks!

5953

Brian Ruban, were I on that dating site, I would definately reply. Anyone with a cat that awesome has to be a fun guy!

5954

The most consistent feedback I’ve gotten about my profile is to tone down the nerd self-identification.

I think being a dude who is into fantasy can be a bonus to some ladies. It is, however, a big big negative to a much more sizable majority. Unless your S.O. absolutely must love fantasy, I’d ditch the Conan pic.

tl;dr
You look slightly uncomfortable (striking a pose?), and it’s way too nerdy.

Not to say all nerdery is bad. Cosmic Hippo’s pics aren’t about fantasy, and instead says to his prospects “Why yes beautiful, I do run titrations. Frequently.” Also, (more seriously) he’s professional and gets paid for his nerdery. That’s attractive.

That said, I think you’re fucking awesome for sitting on Conan’s throne. But, I’m also a dude on an internet gaming message board.

5955

Also looking like Louis CK with more hair helps.

I’m *reeeealy tempted to get a picture here to get critiqued. Thing is that I’ve changed a few things wardrobe wise recently, and I wonder if I should post a before, or after.

(also, I’m the weirdest guy ever when it comes to hair and/or beard. I never know what style suits me more)

So Fire, do you do critiques even if it’s some dude is a 10 year long secure marriage? :D

5956

Why thank you very much. :) It’s a favorite picture of mine. :)

5957

fuck it. Let’s try a “before” pic:

5958

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaww yeah, bow chicka bow wow

5959

I’d love to know what you think of that one picture I put up in the gallery thread.

For the records, no, despite what the caption says I don’t have a daughter, or any other kids.

5960

That must really be the poor bus if they can only afford to use park benches inside the bus.

— Alan