I hope it worked out with him and that Elizabeth Warren chick.
I’d go with Mohammed Kim.
I’m 50. It really depends on the age and the type of person. Tinder/Grindr are just not something folks in my age range use, much. Dating sites are very common, however. But contrast that with the younger people I know and it is a stark difference, as they prefer what I like to term, “aint nobody got time for that - dating.” Meaning, dating sites are really the online version of an older style, personals. Sure, they are beefed up with pics and messages, pokes and emails, but they are personal ads. Tinder skips all that shit and puts the pics front and center. Yes or no. Then skips to texts. Done. Dating in the timeline of the internet generation that doesn’t have time to watch a 5 minute video, much less read a profile.
Not to say there aren’t old people using Tinder (assuming Grindr as well) or young people on dating sites, but that’s my perception.
I think people do have time, I think they designed the interface to be like a videogame, and incredibly superficial. But who knows. Dating is a battlefield. Good luck out there buddy! Merry Christmas!
Happily dating the same gal for 2 years now. I’m out of the game, again. Hopefully permanently?
Merry Christmas to you and the family, Guap.
Two years should be long enough to know if you’re happy. Sounds like you are. Congrats. It’s not easy to find the right person to be with.
Awesome to hear!
So, we filed for divorce last week after 22.5 years of marriage. Not leaping into creating dating profiles just yet, but skimming this topic to see what’s in store. The last time I asked someone out on a date was in 1994, when online dating was done through newspaper ads with voicemail boxes. Plus, I’m 53 instead of 29. This is gonna be interesting.
Wow, best of luck to you buddy.
Met my wife of 6 years (2nd time) on OKcupid.
I didn’t even think about dating for a year after my divorce.
Thanks. It’s all very amicable and friendly, which is great since we have a 15-year-old kid. Just grew apart over the years. So, not heading into dating with bitterness or distrust, unlike some divorcees.
It’s actually going to be interesting to meet some new people. The crack pipe anecdotes above might have tempered my enthusiasm just slightly.
Oh ignore those anecdotes. You’ll be fine. Just put your profile and be active on some reputable sites (I had the best luck with OK Cupid back in the day, but there are more options now) and be open to finding someone wherever.
I mean I met my wife in therapy, so who the hell knows where it’ll happen for you? ;)
Sorry to hear that and good luck Denny!
Happy it’s amicable since that’s especially better for your kids, however.
Diego
Read other guy’s profiles and get an idea of what you’re up against. Most are hilariously bad and you’ll feel better about yourself. And know what not to do.
Read thru the woman’s profiles for a bit before actually joining with your real profile. Again, to see what is actually out there and what you think you might want and what they are looking for. As soon as you create your real profile you’ll probably get a glut of hits just because you’re new.
When actively searching, read the damn profile. Then read it again. Hell, do it again. An intro message referring to something in the profile will go a long way towards helping get a response since it shows you took the time to read what they wrote and not just spam the first pretty pics you saw. And you can catch things that might be a deal-breaker for you (smoker, she only wants older/younger/NSA/no cats/whatever) that you might have missed. On her profile my wife had forgotten to set an age range so it defaulted to like 26-65. That was an easy and humorous thing to mention in an initial message that showed I read her profile and had a sense of humor that worked with hers.
Be ready for rejection, usually before any sort of meeting, and frequently enough after a meeting. Took me a while to figure out that even ‘good’ dates/meets could end with never hearing from the gal again. For little to no apparent reason. It will happen so keeping an open mind can be tough, but you can’t let that get you down.
You’ll cross really crazy gals, but I don’t think that’s anything compared to the crazy dudes the ladies have to deal with (see the first thing I wrote about reading other guys’ profiles). The women will probably be a bit guarded cuz they’ve probably been burnt (my wife who I met online had met with a dude who used another person’s pic in the profile…before we met, btw, and another dude who got crazy jealous over texting when she wouldn’t immediately respond). So try to empathize with their plight a bit.
As far as sites, I’d go with OKC first, then Match. Tinder/Bumble are possible but you sift thru a lot of chaff if you’re actually looking for more than just dates. Match had the higher number of profiles and if you’re in a high population area a smaller group like OKC might be easier to deal with at first. And many post profiles on both. POF was a trashbin for the most part when I was online, but locations may vary and I think some folk on here used it to good effect.
Good lord, I wrote a lot!
Well, this thread really helped me back when my wife left me so I try to give back when anyone has do deal with this crap again. Feel free to ignore as you feel fit.
Maybe interesting:
Thanks, @lostcawz! Great advice. As a writer, the profile writing part sounds fun – just have to somehow let on that while I can entertaining in person, I’m at my best on paper, so temper expectations accordingly. :)
A quick browse of Match.com wasn’t really heartening (a lot of people aren’t very good at finding much to say about themselves, but boy, everyone likes to hike!), but I haven’t done much deep searching yet.
I’ve pretty much given up on the whole idea. Nothing seems as useful as OkCupid used to be, even OkCupid. And the more I think about the dates I’ve had from it, the more I realize that I never did really have a connection with any of them, as much as I was eager to pretend for the sake of having that particular hole in my life filled.
How do I find someone I do? Well, fuck if I know. No, actually, that’s not true. There is someone I feel that with (who I actually did run into on OkCupid, though I knew her well beforehand), but I just tried to date her again this weekend and it didn’t happen and haven’t heard from her since. So, y’know…that’s not going great.
Ouch. Sorry to hear that. How long have you been out there? If it’s been a while maybe a short break would recharge you and even try redoing your profile a bit. I know back when I was doing this anytime I made a change to my pics I would get a boost of interest. I think people will skim over profiles until something new catches their eye, even if it’s just a shiny new pic on a profile they have already seen.
Like 10 years now. But I deleted my OkCupid profile when they pulled the dumb real name shit and don’t have any real desire to go back.