2776

But do they have steamed fake hams?

2777

No, that’s more of a St. Albans thing.

2778

When you fuck up, never apologize, double down, and also make every web browser illegal.

Honestly, I just assume this is true because Parson is so stupid it would just make sense.

2779
2780

Not the onion.

2781

How are you lost if you have a cell signal? WTF indeed.

Edit: oh, I see. The hiker didn’t even know people were looking for him/her.

2782

Huh. I didn’t even read the article because I want the headline to just exist on its own for me.

Had reception but too embarrassed to call for help, I guess? That’d be me. But if I had cell I think I’d be able to sort it out with the GPS.

2783

DND with only accept calls from contacts 4 lyfe, yo~

2784

Yep. There’s a difference between “lost” as in the person is desperately in need of rescue and “lost” in terms of friends/families got concerned and called authorities for help while the person thought they still had things under control. In defense of this hiker, they did have things mostly under control and were fine and got back to their car on their own.

2785
2786

That dude should probably… stop stealing stuff?

2787

hot take alert!

2788

What a pointless, stupid prosecution, no matter what the charge.

2789

I wonder if the DA there is elected? Stuff like this often fits into electoral politics in some places. But yeah, not only morally indefensible, it’s a terrible waste of resources and just undercuts whatever remaining respect anyone might have for the criminal justice system. Which, admittedly, is probably not much.

2790

The other outrage should be that a 20oz bottle of soda should not cost $2.29.

2791

Clearly, you’ve never been to an Airport. Or Theme Park/Zoo/Etc. $2.29 would be a bargin.

2792

Not in the last 17 years. :)

I am still outraged by the $1.50 asking price at the work vending machines.

2793

Hell, the vending machines here on our campus cost $2.25 for a bottle.

2794

There is a vendor site (Sungard) in Philly that had 20oz bottles for 50 cents before the Pandemic in 2020, I haven’t been there since, but I can imagine the prices are still low. :)

2795

Probably subsidized by the business. My office used to do the same but everything got taken over by some, “vending management,” company several years ago. They handle the stocking, the point of sale system for ringing things up, credit card processing, etc. All the prices are waaaaay up. A soda and some single serving chips are easily $5.50-$6.00. It’s insane. I mean, I can literally leave the site and go eat out for not much more than that.