The last word on Barry Bonds

Let’s fucking hope so, anyway.

Elk semen? Where in the world would Barry Bonds get elk semen?

Cabela’s. Next to the buck piss.

Is that paper like the Onion? Because I can only hope all that crap is true and comes to light. If there’s one thing that can help young males stay off steroids it’s big lactating boobs.

oh wait…

That’s the best URL I’ve ever seen

I thought it was a pretty good article till the end where it turned into some kinda Onion article

When the multimillionaire star testified before the BALCO grand jury in December 2003, a juror inquired why he failed to share a bit more of his wealth with the trainer.

“Man, you have no idea how much elk splooge costs,” Bonds retorted.

“Excuse me?” the juror asked.

“Did I fucking stutter?” Bonds snapped, invoking one of his favorite put-downs. “I don’t have time for this shit. Magowan! You owe me another stadium, bitch.”

WTF?

LOL, no need to even read the article. Actually I don’t even want to after seeing that…but maybe that shit works?

SF Weekly is a typical indie weekly, and that article is a joke. Sorry to disappoint.

You think? You mean some guy really didn’t go on a tri-state crime spree and rob 44 convenience stores stealing nothing but gas money, Slim Jims and Hostess Ho-Hos?

Dude that happened to my cousin.

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Man, you miss so much when you don’t read the last page.

It was interesting how the article went from the plausible to the implausible. Other than the “Slim Jim Bandit” bit at the start, it was believable at first. The Onion would have been over the top from the start.